Yes. I stare into space occasionally, unintentionally.

Like a slap in the face it was.

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In London now and blogging from my phone while watching 'celebrity juice' on the sofa bed, occasionally wishing I'm not beating myself over an invisible tight rope I tied me self with to tree.

Eff this.

I'm wishing for a more refreshing year with no shits. Considering I'll be graduating in a few months time and starting anew with a job at a totally new place, I don't know if it'll be refreshing or just as shitty.

Saw a photo of me months back on me holiday with friends and wondered how I put that mask on so nicely. Even on a lone trip, what was that doing, still on? What about now?

Just having a moment. Cheers for a new happy year. Happy holidays! xo

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Happy Birthday, Ariz!

It's Ariz's birthday today!

"I had chocolate cake with Spiderman on top! Got webs also! But then, not enough anymore to share.."

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Watched Beauty and The Beast just now. (and cried, hehehe)

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So weird.

That was the first time that all the good moments I had with friends flashed through my mind during my 5 minutes of unconsciousness.

I opened my eyes and thought, "What am I doing here?"

Am I in deep shit?

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Guess what I got in my mail box this evening??

The famous writing. :) Tak payah tengok who's the sender pun I would know.

Aww. Love them gifts!

Thank you very much NJ! I know you stalk my blog so this entry is dedicated to you. :)

And yes, its snowing heavily here. "Let it Snow!"

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I'm. Feeling. Nauseous.

Must be due to the shock of cold weather.

I have a class test this Friday and I haven't started studying.

Head is too heavy and my insides feel like coming out. I don't have them damn butterflies, I have them slugs!

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Run then Pause

So many things have been happening. I've just realised there were lots of tagged pictures of me on my Facebook over last weekend, and it was (obviously) only over the weekend!

We went to Corinthian, like I said. And it was the night of Teera's birthday!! It was alright, to be honest the DJ wasn't doing a good job. So we went downstairs and enjoyed till late! By the time we went out, it was foggy, surprisingly quiet as everyone else finishes an hour earlier, AND our feet hurts! We literally just walked over 100m and had to sit at the pavement to take a rest. :D The next day: Open house raya. Kekeke

Macam TV sitcom melayu wannabe tak? Hehehe

Teera and I after having one of our best night outs of the YEAR.

I had to go to Edinburgh on Wednesday for my hospital attachment. I had to take the half past 7 train and then take the bus to the hospital which I am soooooo hopeless at, taking a bus! It also meant I had to wake up early. BLUEKH. After I've reached Edinburgh, the bus I was expecting didn't turn up! And suddenly a big red bus was approaching with a big sign on top, "Western Genaral (H)". I was like, "YES! Let's just hop on this one!". Then I asked the driver, "Could you tell me the stop for Western General?" and he replied, "Neh, you'll see it. It's huge!". Ok whatever. I reached there right on time and met my partner, only to be told by the staff "We
didn't expect you until 10!". OK again. Well at least I don't have to wake up as early next week.

Anyway, my deadline was coming near for my draft intro and honestly I was stressed out because I've reached over the maximum. There's just too much to mention on warfarin. Boring notes aside, I made it through! We had to put our draft into Turnitin, to evaluate the originality of our reports and minimize plagiarism. I had 13% which is OK since we need to get less than 15%.

We also went to the pre-opening of Uncle Kush and Aunty Ahnis's cafe called Kafe Wau! I feel that it'll be a great place and my prayers are with them and the cafe! I can feel it in my bones. :) Despite the cold weather, we took 'Three Steps to Heaven'. It was heavenly.

Us at the cafe. Behind the counter but acting like customers! Haha

Heavenly heaven. Especially in the cold weather.

And right before Glasgow Games 2010, it snowed. Terribly. Like a blizzard! This is the first time I've seen Glasgow white on the first fall of snow! I peeked outside my window and some people were walking backwards cause the wind was too strong to face! Poor them Friday night out go-ers.
Pre-GG10. The weather was super cold but the sun and sky was awesome! Rare occasion, that was.

The boys clearing up the pitch for football.

I wouldn't actually say it was a good two weeks or so. But it was definitely 'full of life'. As if I've got nothing better to do la kan. I've got a major class test next Friday and I haven't started shit. And I'm already catching a cold since it was so bloody sejuk today during GG10 and couldn't feel my toes at all! Up to my ankles!! And now that I've got a cold, I'm growing impatient and grumpy and cranky. Great! :)

Imma take my sleep now (with Walkabout blaring across the road and the abangs kakaks pakciks and makciks singing their throats out the karaoke bar downstairs.) Just great! :)

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Blog posts setakat ni semua emotional. Tak patut tak patut.

Friday ni going to The Corinthian with the Greeks! Weeeehoooooooo.

Never actually been to the place and tengok dari luar je selalu especially since I was neighbours dengan Corinthian ni during first year. hehe. Orang posh2 je pergi, atas kepala pun kena ada bunga. huahuahua. Oleh itu, my preparation dah siap. Dress dah beli, kasut pakai je la apa yang ada.
:D :D :D

Good news. I got a new baby nephew!! His name is Alif. :) Can't wait to meet him! Ntah bila la tu :( Prolly when he's already running about. Hoho.

Will post up pictures from Corinthian. (tengah pikir orang2 kat Corinthian bawak ke camera pun?? Hmmmmm)

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The feeling of not able to turn anywhere and just be myself and just be on my own. To just let your emotions go and allow them to burst. Sometimes I feel like walking around town at night, but I don't live by the river anymore to get fresh air. And I don't take nicotine anymore like the Cheryl Tweedy in me, so that's a bit worthless. Can't even cry in the rain cause its too cold! Haha.

I was really really, extremely upset yesterday with a friend who's forgotten his promise. It's not what I would call a 'promise' but if I say the word then I'd let the cat out of the bag. And I don't want that to happen because he's a good friend of mine. I needed to get it out of my system, but to whom? Not anyone here, or the news would start again. Fuck, this is complicated. I hate that trait of him. What the fuck is he thinking of now?? Is he just going to take advantage of all this??

I'm not the type of person to confront someone. Unless it's really extreme. I'm not a strong person. I'll be the helpless ostrich among the bunch, slamming my head into the ground just to hide away from problems and thinking they would solve on their own. I can't even be strong for my friends even when they needed me the most. And I'll be the selfish one to look for their comfort and support. I'm talking bull crap.

I feel like I need my own space, to just be alone, to keep in touch with myself. And now I miss my lone-ventures. Going to new places and breathe in their air and not care of anything. I went through the pictures of me going to Devon, they were gorgeous. I miss the places. Memories are only excuses. These, are good experiences.

Hate is more of what I'm feeling now.

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Drained out Weekend

So I went to Nottingham Games this year for the second time ever since my first year. :) Glad to say we managed to get THREE buses from Glasgow! And I heard Edinburgh had one bus. Whooping four buses from Scotland.

Trip was nice. We left at 11pm Friday night after the fireworks display. OBVIOUSLY too early to leave as trip to Notts should only take us 6-ish hours. So yea, plus the rempit driving of the three buses, we managed to get our butts in front of the Sports Centre at 4.50am. YES! It was freakin' cold and we had no where to go.

We bumped into two of the committees and they said they could arrange the SC to open early at 5.30am. Our drivers are getting anxious as they wanted to leave and take a nap. How helpful! So we sorted out everyone's breakfasts and got out of the bus about 5.30am like promised, only to be told the SC could not be opened, and can only be done so at 7am. Bummer. What's worse was that all three buses left! Hmph.

So we were told by that committee person that we could walk to Portland Building for 20-ish minutes or wait till 7am for the SC to open. We decided to walk because I swear it was colder than Glasgow at that point! IT WASN'T EVEN 20 MINUTES! Over betul. It was less than 10 minutes.

We got to the PB with some persuading of the security and got all 140 people into the building to have our breakfasts. Only to be told off by another one of the committee member to leave the building. Reason was "It's the policy." When asked where we should go when nothing's opened, she said "You should wait in front of the SC supposedly." "Well it's not opened yet." "Yea, most of the committees are still asleep." Is that a legit reason? But anyway, we left and walked slowly back to SC just in time. Whilst enjoying the nice autumn scenery. Nasib baik kan? Haha. Enough with the rants.

Hugging Farah for some warmth!

Budget concentrate tengok jejaka2 main for finals.

After watching our netball team!

So the usual goes by like any other year. Pergi makan-makan, jalan-jalan, tengok a few games, meet up with Farah, and loads of juniors from KYS, gila berlambak rasa macam tua je. Come to think of it, should've asked around for people from Plymouth kut-kut la ada. Since kononnya I'm gonna work there next year after I graduate. Tapi owh well, dah over. Anyway, the weather was AWESOME! The sun was out, it was cool yet you could still feel the heat. Should've brought my sunnies, damn it. (They said it rained in Glasgow that day. Lebat! Nasib baik aku turun Notts!)

The night was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO cold! We watched our netball team doing their thang, and then watched finals for football while shivering our brains out. By half 7 at night we were in the bus, starting our journey back home to Glasgow. Slept through the trip back home much easier compared to the trip down to Notts. And we arrived at 2-ish in the morning? I think? Yea.

Hall was too full we literally sat on the floor, Msian style!

Cold is kickin' in!

It was a good trip, definitely. Tired out of my wits feel like all my limbs are gonna fall off due to the cold, but it could be worse right? I remember it was that cold even during the day the first time I went to Notts Games. Crazy. I had fun, met old friends and school mates, random people I haven't met for years, too. Tapi tak kenal orang-orang baru like last time. Dang. Most of them are younger than me, rasa tua. Hahahahaha.

I feel like sleeping and sleep and just sleep and continue sleeping because I'm still mentally and physically tired! :)

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You Lost Me

credit: yayforcbs@youtube

You Lost Me by Christina Aguilera.

So beautiful. Sooooo soulful. Ain't it? :)

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Year End





I wish! haha.

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What If

Thinking of the what ifs, knowing it won't happen.

I did better when I didn't try, so maybe I should just stop. Right?

Time for a spice. Memories are only just excuses at this point.

For my own f*cking good, I shouldn't bottle it up. But it's been done, and now all that I'm doing is trying to not overflow it. Stupid.

Forgive me, this is the only place in the whole world that I can express myself. Other than God.

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Candy Jewel

Yes I'm promoting my own jewelry blog. :)

It's not much yet but more will come. Put it on your bookmark aite? And don't forget to share it!

p/s: We only do it in the UK currently, but will definitely tell when we go international! :)

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Matt Cardle

I want Matt Cardle to serenade me to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep! Sigh, jarang daku cair dengan celebrity. Hihihi fangirl mode sikit.


Credit: TheXFactorUK

He will be great later on! I know it! It's only 2nd week and he's already great. He'll grow, I tell you! :))))

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I'm actually back in Glasgow already. It's been a week.

'I am a Girl' talking:

Harini first day period and my calendar is wrong. Stupid app. Pinggang sakit nak mati. What's worse that could happen? Owh. Of course. Having all my songs deleted from my iPod. My iPod IS COMPLETELY SONG-LESS now apart from those that I bought which I might say is not more than 10 at all. Lessons, lessons. OMG TOLONG LAH DEPRESSED NAK MATI!!!!!!!!! And everytime I see Asda's adverts on their yummy donuts and all, I get sad. TOLONGGGGG. I feel so stupid. T.T And tomorrow's Sunday already! WTF. And and my classes takdala sebanyak last year but but but. Urghhhhhhhh.


Honest confession:

Harini 'borak' with Teddy and realised betapa sedihnya daku kerana tak dapat jumpa as promised. Before I left pun takda bunyi (not that I expected it) tapi rasa-rasanya macam sebelum tu ada cakap something as if nak contact? Or I'm plain daft? Anyway, saya sekarang seorang perempuan cepat terasa especially with old friends. Ok please slap me in the butt, thank you very much. Ever since you know what happened la kan, I'm a bit more sensitive, rasa macam, rasa macam, it's indescribable. Only God knows. But as usual aku ni suka berlakon as if I'm okay. Tapi memang I'm okay pun so whatever lah.


Let's end this post for good. I'm sad and depressed and disappointed over my iPod. Stupid.

On a cheerful note, have you guys watched this? It's been awhile dah pun actually, but suddenly felt like sharing this. I like! Imagine me saying 'stupid' at 0:59 like that. HAHA suka ok. Suka. Enjoy!

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Stress is beginning to build up on me. Friends are rejecting invitations. Not blaming them but I'm stressed up because I won't know when will be the next time I'll meet them. Obviously my final week here will be untouchable. All is about family next week. Well, will try to.

I can't get anything done around here. Everything's just so hard. No one to mengadu to except this place here where I can't even write what I want. Ish tu pun cannot.

Very disappointing. Balik Glasgow je lah, I'll be happier will I? No, it's different. But here is very disappointing. Not them, but myself inclusive. The peer pressure feels like I'm left out due to a particular reasoning. Owh well.

Can't believe I only have 10 days left. For the first time, I feel like I can't wait to go back.

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All Round


My 22nd birthday was on Raya Eve. So obviously there was no having a meal out or celebrating with friends like previous years. Instead, I spent my precious 22nd with my family, getting ready for Raya! Tiring like hell, almost passed out (again) but it was different for once, and nice too!

This raya seemed and felt a little bit different. Felt better, like we moved on to a new routine and got used to it already. Extra emotional, actually for the first time, during maaf session. Don't know why, I just broke down when I held my Dad's hands. Probably just a huge amount of gratefulness that I got to celebrate raya together, and thankful for all of my parent's sacrifices for me.

Now I just need to make time to fit everyone in the calendar. Sigh.

Not used to opening up to anyone. I wonder what God's plans are for me.

p/s: Have I mentioned I'll be in Plymouth July/Aug 2011?? :)) Have a good remaining raya!

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I know most girls chop their hair as a sign of a change. For the better or to start anew. To be honest that's how I felt. Chop off all the bad 'omens' I've collected for the past year.


That doesn't show I'm DEPRESSED! I am nothing but depressed, my friends. Tell me which summer break do I NOT cut my hair. I don't understand, seriously. Stop assuming I'm miserable, depressed, crying my eyes out. STTTTOOOPPPPPPP! I'm a big girl now, I know what to do. Ok? Sorry I'm not what you think I am. Psh..

In the mean time, do you like my new hair?? :)

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Alhamdulillah, I am so glad and thankful that I am blessed with such good friends.

Today had iftar with them and finally got to catch up with some of them, not all of us could come and join. And now that I'm home, I just can't appreciate enough on how lucky I am to get great old friends. 10 years and counting, guys.

I had good laughs like the usual. Not to say that I never had a hearty laugh in Glasgow. But you know what I mean, it's different with old buddies. You get to catch up, joke around, reminisce, laugh as ugly as you like. :D I just feel so relieved, like all the weight from my shoulders have lifted, like I've forgotten all the problems I have (as if I do).

Thank you. Wishing everyone else could be with us.

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I now have SHORT HAIR!! :))) I have never been happier in having short hair I have no idea why. It's shorter than any short hair you've seen me in.

I won't upload any pictures, cause no one except my family have seen it. He he he he heeeeee, suspense la konon. :) but it looks ok. I'm happy!

I've joined my sister in our jewelry-making venture. Having someone to do them with is better than making them alone. Although I am definitely a bit rusty, hehe.

Tomorrow buka puasa with some friends, finally get to meet them. I feel a bit different about it somehow. Owh well, it's just me thinking too much as usual and being sensitive where I shouldn't. Can't wait! Don't know what to have for iftar though. Fast food? Good food? Fast and good food? Good but slow food? Hmmmm..

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Kenapa tak nak update blog?



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Firstly, Happy Fasting to all my Muslim readers! Salam Ramadhan, may this Ramadhan be better than our previous Ramadhan.

I have finished work and currently quite missing the place. Always keep telling people stories of work and lone-vacation. :)

Now I am occupied with moving to my new flat. The flat is wonderful and I absolutely love it! It's unfurnished, so I had a few trips trying to find furnitures and other home stuff for the flat. I will be staying with my sister. I'm still staying at my old flat because I haven't found myself a bed yet! Grrrr. And all my belongings are still in my old room, and finding a suitable date to move them. SO BLOODY EXCITED!

I'm going back home to Kajang next Thursday. I can't believe it. I'm not prepared at all! My stuff are all over the place! I'll be going back for exactly a month. And I just realised I'll be back here on a Sunday afternoon and class starts the next day. Bijak Izati ni, bijak.

Not mentally and emotionally prepared at all to face everyone. But seriously people, don't take me seriously when I say I'm not fine. That was just during that mili-second and the next I am absolutely fine!! Pfft. So don't be saying here and there that I am miserable cause if you're here in Glasgow, the only thing that is miserable is the not-so-summer weather. I am far from miserable, put that in your head. Believe me. Geram betul aku, bukannya you even talk to me ke apa pun to know how I feel ke apa ke. Senang-senang buat kesimpulan. I'm just losing weight sebab puasa, tu jeeeerrrrr. Jangan over-analyze please?

Ok, I'm at the miserable (haha) library here during my summer break, now THAT'S miserable. And I have to head home now to charge me phone and call me parents and then head back out to town to sort me bank details and all that jazz. TOODLES!

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The pain has come.

It's a delayed reaction.

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Gain and Lost

So many things to say yet so little time (actually just plainly no time to write). This week is the last week I'm working and I haven't been put to a place for my preregistration training yet after I graduate. I'll have to harass them. :)

Friends in Glasgow are harassing agents to find me a suitable flat. I'm hoping everything will go well. Did I mention, I'LL BE STAYING WITH MY SISTER NEXT YEAR! Don't have to mention my current agent. What cheeky bastards they are, it's just disgusting.

Blogspot is still being funny.

I'm going back to Glasgow next Tuesday night. And then after that Tuesday, it'll be just over two weeks till I go back home. Home sweet home. Mentally unprepared!!

Currently I'm missing a particular friend right now, terasa drifted apart. I think I can guess why but I hope that's not the reason. Sad, really sad. Not gonna talk about it, feel so childish. People do get drifted apart, so I'll just have to accept that.

I don't know how to pack up all my stuff. I don't think they're all under 20kg. EFF!

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Just a little over ten days and I'll be leaving the place with nice weather, fun people and peacefulness. Time passes by quickly, doesn't it?

I just got back from a four-day holiday trip to Ilfracombe in North Devon, alone. Don't tell me that's sad, cause its not! :) I've always wanted to try travelling alone, feeling selfish and breathing fresh air, experiencing what's 'local'.

Walked along the beautiful coast, enjoyed the harbour, took a cruise trip to see the seals and relaxed at the long stretch of beach in Woolacombe, enjoying the sounds of huge waves with a cone of softee with a '99'. Bliss. Worth it. Didn't even cost me a fortune, I must add.

And as my original plans of taking advantage of the time that I am here to explore nice places, I've done them, alright. But I realise there's just too many good places to go to!! However, I'm grateful. If God forbids, I'll be seeing lots of them more often if I ever get to work here, insyaAllah.

Not gonna spoil the read by writing down my 'experiences' at work but I must say that I'm lucky I've met wonderful colleagues (and customers too). I will miss them dearly, that's for sure.

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To look forward..

Still hasn't sunk in. The fact that this placement that I'm doing is a form of evaluation of them offering me a job. A JOB, after I graduate. I'm grateful and glad I've been recommended, however I still haven't completely grasped the fact that if I could be and do a good job later on. Scary isn't it. I haven't even thought of it.

Whatever it is, what's confirmed is that IF I do get a job, it won't be in Scotland. I'll be here in England. I've said to my tutor I'm not someone that is limited, I go with the flow and I don't mind to be placed anywhere but in my honest opinion, no matter how much I'm loving this peaceful place, I don't think I can live here alone. To go through all this alone. Nope. No I can't.

Let's just scrap that for a moment then.

I'm gonna have a five-day break starting this Saturday. I've been roughly planning in my head where to go. I wanna go to nice beaches, small towns by the cliff, praying the weather would be nice, stay in B&B's, just relax and breath in the fresh air. Hoping all will go to plan. My horoscope said "A short holiday trip will change your life and be a memorable one." Not that I believe horoscopes tapi bestnya! Now I'm even MORE looking forward to it. :)) But seperti biasa, bak kata Mummy, "Jangan berangan, nanti sure takkan jadi." Ok Mum.

I'm just extremely itching to go shopping though!! I don't have any time at all to go! I work out of town and I travel during weekends, how am I supposed to go shopping! And it's summer sale now!!! URRRRRGGGGHHHHH.

It feels weird now. The feeling of being alone. Not loner kind of alone. I have LOADS of good company and I love them to bits. The fact that I don't get close to people easily to tell them of my life, my secrets; that feels weird, not being to share things. Friends I'm close with would know I don't even share that many things about myself with my family. We just don't really tell like personal things to each other. Unless it's good gossip and good sales! :DD But yea, it just suddenly got to me. Hehe, funny.

Here's for another good lone-getaway!

This has been stuck for a couple of days now.

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Can't wait to be back in Glasgow for the weekend! Miss everyone so muchhh.

p/s: Why is blogspot being weird? I can't put pictures and stuff, got none of that toolbar thingy. Hmm?

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I went to Bristol to meet EG before he goes back to Malaysia after he graduates, (as if I won't meet him in KL la kan)

Bristol was great, kinda reminds me of Edinburgh, the weather was great. We had lunch and I got to meet new friends.

Details aside, my last train to Taunton was at 10.15pm and we had exactly 15 minutes to go there. It was great fun indeed, running with everyone and fighting with the traffic lights. At that moment, I finally felt care-free. :)

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It's coming

And I'm not ready

Let's just embrace it


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Have I mentioned in this blog that I passed my 3rd year as a pharmacy student and I can go to my MPharm 4th year? No?



I have no idea how I've forgotten to post this great great news here. I mean the moment I saw my results, I took out my phone and got to the calculator app and straight away counted my average and I PASSED!! I literally cried of gratefulness, terus sujud syukur!!

Anyway, let's all pray for a good and a much better final year for me, aye? :))

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Do it

The only downside of travelling alone is you think. You're not suppose to think when you're travelling!

Its as if you hold your head and knock it on the pavement.

And I realise I've been brushing them off, setting them aside, just couldn't let myself turn to face them.

I'm doing it well. My logic is doing well.

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Weekend Walk

It's already the end of my second week here in Taunton. Time flies by very quickly, aye?

I've been wondering what to do on weekends on my own. Member takda, semua orang tua-tua. That girl hasn't contacted me ever since and so I felt like I didn't wanna bother her. And so I'm on my own!! It's kind of a good but a bad thing as well.

So for this weekend my tutor has been telling me to go on the 'Tarka Line', somewhere through/from Barnstaple. But that's a bit of a far stretch for me to go alone on my second week. (Hinting maybe later on I will do it. ;p)

Through the power of Google, I searched and searched of a few other possible things I could travel to. There was Sidmouth, Exeter, Beer, Pecorama, Dartmoor and so many other places recommended by people. If you try searching for their images, then yeah, those are the kind of places that I WANT to visit! I want to be blown away by beautiful sceneries, beaches, coast lines. Just blow me away, Devon!!

There was an interesting idea that was reviewed and I feel like I'm up to the challenge. "A 5-miles walk from Branscombe to Beer through the coast line and back inland." Not that big of 'challenge', I mean I walk about a mile to school every single day in Glasgow, so 5 miles would be ok, right? Right? The bonus is the scenic view! I can't wait. I want to do it. I'll bring a book, lunch box, definitely sunblock. :)

We'll see how it goes. Very excited! But as Mum always say, "Jangan berangan, nanti tak jadi." So OK Mum, I won't berangan. Instead I'll plan! :D So very early on Saturday morning I will go to the train station, and ask what's the best way to go to Beer. Yes, that I will do. And we will see what will wait for me. I will embrace it happily, insyaAllah.

Btw, did I mention my tutor boasted about me to the pharmacist that I was originally supposed to work with? :) I hope I could do a good job towards my remaining 6 weeks. Crossing my fingers!

Anyway, please pray for my safety in travelling which is what I've been wanting to do since I first stepped onto the grounds of UK, and please pray for me so that I could and would do good for my placement here. THANK YOU LOVES!

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Happy Father's Day!

When I was much younger in my pre-school days, I would call Daddy as "D" while he would call me as "B" and I allowed NO ONE ELSE to call me by that. Except my dearest Daddy. :)

Such a calm and collected dad, so many achievements that are so inspiring, yet so down to earth that even WE don't know them. All we know is that when he reaches home, he will of course do work but he will never mention them. As I would meet his students occasionally, they would tell me of some of his works etc. and they were surprised I didn't know anything about it! Hahaha.

Dad is in the "quiet group" of the family, as Azrina and I call them. They would sit together and as if talk with their minds while the other extreme group is the "laugh as loud as you can" group. That's where I come from, of course. HAHA!

I was watching Michael McIntyre's show last night and he was talking about how dads give cool and "out of your mind" advices and that's because they lie! Hahaha. But we would always believe them! Obviously, Mum would always, ALWAYS be the main victim and all of us would laugh on it hard!

Do you find it weird that whenever mothers say anything, we tend to justify it first, not to mention quarrel. But when fathers told us to do anything, we would do it STRAIGHT AWAY, no hesitations whatsoever. It feels like a law! :))

He is a man I look up to. The love he has for his wife and family is just unmeasurable. My sister and I would always giggle and joke around on how Mum and Dad would ALWAYS wear matching clothes whenever they go out. And we, would have the pleasure of having the headache in choosing them.

*won't mention anything about his beloved car, always under its own blanket during the night or it will 'catch a cold'. :)*

Anyway, I love you, Dad. You are my inspiration and my strength, my idol. May you be protected by The Almighty, given good health and cherished with all His love, now and forever towards Jannah.

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The other side

I'm getting used to talking in English accent now, and not Scottish. Haha

I've only been here for 5 days and I should say it feels like a breath of fresh air. Actually, it's one of those typical places and neighborhood you would ever imagine, but actually living in one and knowing them is another feeling. Also getting to know people who lives in one of those nice villages with big big farms, just like in the movies. The weather has been nice too. It's the first day of summer here, officially. And there was not a single cloud today! Didn't help that our air-conditioning doesn't work. Roastedddddddd.

The landlady I'm living with, Lesley, is such a dear. Although it's only the 3rd day of work she's constantly asking if the place is ok, whether the travel was good etc. Yes, I'm not really working in the centre of Taunton now. Instead I was transferred to a place called Norton Fitzwarren. As they say, just at the outskirts of Taunton. I was lucky enough to know a kind colleague, Ellie that could give me a ride. A soft-spoken yet tough girl, she is. "I'm a farm girl and I ride my small car like a four-by-four~! :))" Hehe. (yes, she does)

Anyway, the first few days has been quite the same thing as my intern at the hospital last summer. I was telling myself how last summer is really helping me in this as I pick things up very quickly. But just at the dispensary. Once I meet a customer, I forget all the things I've learnt how to do in classes. I regret being a little bit unconfident when Lindsay, my tutor, suggested that I should handle a customer on my own. Wonder what she'll think of that, then, when I should've been excited to do it. What a waste of PP3, huh? Ironically, Lindsay studied in Glasgow!

I've met quite a lot of Malaysians during our Welcome Day on Monday. In fact there were five of us, out of 12. One of them is working in Taunton itself while the others are spread across West Somerset. Shanice, the one working in Taunton had the same idea of doing summer intern here: Weekend Vacay!! WOOHOOO! We quickly exchanged numbers and hope that work won't get us busy. Everyone keeps saying that 8 weeks will just fly by. Hmmm.

I'm only eating fish, vege and fruits now (plus the norm breakfast) since I have yet to venture around looking for a halal meat butcher. Hopefully there is cause I don't really know how to cook fish that well!! Plus I have to bring my own lunch, because there's literally nothing there. The store is right in the middle of the road with new housing areas at the opposite side and so far I didn't see any shops that I could go to to mingle about.

And it's the same as last summer during work as well, I sleep a lot earlier. It's only half 10 here but I'm already getting sleepy.

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You told me so

I'm leaving..

To Taunton this Saturday!!!!!


My luggage is 19.7kg!!!!!! URGHHHHH and so I tell myself, it's okay, just bring those important clothes, and you can buy SOME MORE in Taunton. :)))))))))))))))))))))

What's making my luggage near its limit when its only half full? I brought all my jewelry stuff. Ehehehe. Hopefully I'll be bored in that small town and will be inspired to do my jewelry. If not then I'm gonna be mad at myself for bringing that whole lot!!

Anyway, my room is almost empty. Except for some pictures on the wall and stuff that I still need to use, and some books. I've also packed some story books for me to read there. BAH, we'll see how it goes. I bet you I'll be stuck in front of my laptop ALL THE TIME.

I'm so scared on what is prepared for me in Taunton.

Side note: I'm so sick of my long hair. Can't wait to cut it short when I get back home!

Owh speaking of home, I've been looking at tickets to go back home, their prices are ok but the thing is I still can't see how I'm gonna manage my time and stuff so I still have not made my decision. I know I should be quick or the price will go shooting up!

Can't wait to meet the cat that will be teman-ing me during my summer-away! Hari-hari I will gomol-gomol him, I don't care!! :)

Btw now you can say, "I told you so!" :)

Will be posting from Taunton next!

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Urge to Splurge

On my recent trip to the city centre, the aim was to do some grocery shopping for the recent birthday bash's dessert, and to look for casual slacks/trousers for work during the summer later. Plus also a good pair of shoes.

However obviously being a girl that hasn't splurged since.. since.. hmmm, since way before exams maybe? Not sure. NOT including internet shopping of course. *grin* That's more for my jewelry stuff instead for myself. Anyhooooooo. I think maybe only 1 in 10 females stick to their shopping list, if they even have one.

So instead of
A pair of trousers
A pair of shoes

I got

Two pairs of trousers. It's a hard catch for someone like me to find a good pair of trousers that fit PERFECTLY! Proudly from River Island. Belts inclusive. Also provided I don't gain back my weight. My bontot is now normal and can now wear a size 6. It won't last, believe me.

A top from Miss Selfridge. They were having a sale. It was for £5. I needed a happy, joyful-looking top to match the season. Alasan, yes.

Three tops from Zara. Again, sale. Also since there's only one Zara in the city centre and it happens to be the furthest shop from my flat, my trip HAS GOT to be worth it.

A Radley purse. I know you must be thinking, "WHERE THE HELL DID THIS COME FROM?!" I have no idea. Fraser's was only across from Zara. It was raining so I just ran through the door to go to the Men's area to look for stuff. They were having a two day sale on the handbag area. THE PURSE WAS SO CUTE I JUST HAD TO HAVE IT! Owh, I didn't even go up to the Men's area. :)) Owh not forgetting a Ted Baker credit card purse? Ehehe. It was for £5!!! Who wouldn't get that?! If I'm not gonna use it I can sell it, right. Plus, I use my cards more often then I need to carry cash. In case you're wondering, no I don't have credit cards. HAHAH IT'S NOT POINTLESS! :D

No pairs of shoes. The one I liked from Aldo was GONE!! At least I looked for it right. And then I got tired.

Groceries. Gladly!! Did I mention I almost cried because I couldn't choose which biscuits to get. Thank God for big sunnies. Must be the hormones, and the holiday stress (there's such thing right?) and the whole shopping spree around town alone. :) But as usual, dessert turned out to be awesommeeee. FYI, I chose Oreo's over Mandy's, I think?

On a side note, I watched Sex and The City 2 that night and boy was I underdressed!!! WTH its just a movie, you don't have to wear a cocktail dress! T.T Also if you haven't watched the movie, better not unless you're a real real real real die hard fan. I prefer the first one. More laughs and eye-bulging, double takes, mouth gaping scenarios. The second one is more of a realistic thing I guess, like a lesson. BOOOOORIIIINGG. Hehe!

Going to Centre Parcs this weekend. Much needed de-stressor!

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Pack up

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighhh. That's what I've been doing the whole day today, sighing. Not healthy, ladies, not healthy.

On Tuesday I made a day trip down to Taunton. Took a flight to Bristol in the morning. ALMOST COULDN'T MAKE IT! OMG, I was swearing the bus driver every few minutes and was telling myself, "Shit shit shit shit I'm not gonna make it." Imagine, it says that the gate closes at 8.25am on the boarding pass and the bus arrived on - yes my friends, 8.25am. Well it's probably my fault at first because I woke up late, ignored my first alarm and when I got to the bus station the bus was already reversing. T.T

And no, it wasn't at it's stop yet. THERE WAS A LONG LONG QUEUE TO GET INTO THE AIRPORT AND EVEN THE CAB DRIVER IN THE QUEUE WAS READING A NEWSPAPER!!! So I just had to tell the driver that I have to get off NOW and HERE and I ran my heart and legs out and my God, it felt like forever to reach the gate! Thank God for good pair of shoes. Thank God for online check-in. :) Anyway, I made my way through the securities, and even the man said, "Run, girl!". Hahaha budus. The gate was far as well so another marathon for me. And I was right on time. :) *Smug* People were queueing up to get onto the plane.

Since it was a morning flight, I think I was the only one dressed casually with my MJ on my hand and my iPod. Everyone else were probably on their business trips. Haha.

Got to Bristol airport, I realised it was warmer than Glasgow, it has that humidity. Although there was no sun and just clouds, its still a bit warmer. Very nice. Took the bus to Temple Meads train station and the same thing happened again. I was one minute late for the train to Taunton. It was quite an old looking train station and I couldn't understand the timetable and the only thing I knew for sure was that the next train was in one hour's time. URGHHHHHH.

One hour later, I was on my one hour trip to Taunton!!! The scenery was great, so spacious and comfortable! (No, I'm not talking about the train seat, hehe). Felt so jakun and foreign because I'm so used to being in a city. Hehe.

Got to Taunton and I don't know what the temperature was but it surely was HOT! Met Lesley, my landlady at her place at took a peek at the room. It's small and all but its just nice for a short stay, I mean it's not like I'll be there for a whole term right. And finally met her cat, Siam (pronounced as Sa-yem). Soooooo calm but friendly and he knows he's the big boss! Hehe then we had lunch and took a walk to the town. Lesley and I, not Siam and I, haha I wish! It was sooooooooo soooooooooo warm. After that I took a final glance of Taunton and took my train back to Bristol. I slept most of the time.

Once I reached Bristol I told myself I have 2 hours to go around. They say the large shopping centre is heavenly heaven so I was looking for it. After say about 20 minutes walk (?) I finally arrived!!!!!!!!!!!! And honestly I wasn't even close to being impressed. St Enoch's is even better. But then I realise what everyone was talking bout. It's not THAT mall, its the place next to it, called Cabot Circus if I'm not mistaken. OMG. Now THAT'S shopping heaven. It's like a pedestrian street shopping area but there are also indoor places like small malls? I don't know how to explain it and memory doesn't serve me well. Time wasn't on my side really and I kept telling myself "Shit shit shit I don't have time to shop!!!! What a pity!" But then I guess it's a good thing, I don't have a luggage to carry everything together into my flight back to Glasgow. I thought "Hmm I'll get this in Glasgow" Hahaha.

As I was starting to feel tired and exhausted from walking under the sun, I saw Starbucks around the corner near the river and was joyful imagining myself sipping a grande caramel frappucino coffee. BUT THEY RAN OUT OF IT! I was soooo, well, disappointed. But I really needed a cool drink so I settled with that raspberry ice blended tea thingy, I needed the sugar. :)

I walked towards the train station to get to the bus stop to go to the airport but it was still early. So I took a seat in a small park and I felt as if I was jet lagged from the exhaustion! Seriously, my eyes felt swollen and tired. And while sitting there, resting my blistered feet, having my cool drink with dogs running here and there, the warm sun and not-so-cool breeze had me thinking on lots of things. Suddenly I was so afraid of the future, like will I graduate on time? What's gonna happen after that, will I be a great employee at a great company? Will I be here or back in Malaysia?

And suddenly I felt lonely. I don't really have friends here like back home where I can tell just anything at all. No. Frankly and honestly speaking, it's like I have no where to turn to be it for happy or sad news. Of course I share good good memories with people here, they're like my family. I laugh the most with them. But I don't share anything with my real family either so maybe that's the same? People come and go here, maybe that's why. My social skills aren't great then, hehe. So there I was in the middle of the foreign Bristol on my own, missing my friends back home. Especially my girls.

Finally took the bus to the airport, went through the securities, and I was there on time when the flight status suddenly changed. DELAYED. Just great. Sarcasm note aside, it was kind of great. I finally got my caramel frapuccino!!!!! The Starbucks was right in front of my gate. Hehe so glad. And of course, I might as well get my dinner, right.

It was tiring, the trip. But it was nice to be able to clear my head, get my thoughts straight and acknowledge for once what I feel. Because I never really listen to myself. I don't have pictures of the trip, it feels awkward and tourist-y to be taking pictures. :) But now I'm looking forward for my short stay! I'm glad I made the decision to do my intern in Taunton. And no, population dia takda la sikit sangat! Ramai je orang!! Heheheh.

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Delivery Man that doesn't deliver

I'm writing this with full of anger and disappointment and everything except joy and happiness!!! YAYTK!!!!!!!!! Fuh fuh fuh sabar.

So I have been ordering things online, such as wires for my jewelries etc and have been looking forward to them. Surprisingly they dispatched it after just a few hours of ordering and that got me more excited!

On Monday I was supposed to get one of my parcels but this stupid effing postman only left a notice card saying "Sorry you were out.." bla bla bla. HELL-O!!! I WAS IN THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME AND I DIDN'T EVEN HEAR YOU BUZZ!! Excuse my french but I really am pissed!!!

Okay fine, takpa. I had the mood today to go out and pick up my stuff from the post office yang jauhnya agak jauh, and was feeling light as I was really looking forward to my parcel. I had a feeling my second parcel would arrive today because I received an email from them saying it's been dispatched, and since it's a next-day-delivery, memang patut la kan sampai today.

So I waited until noon to actually do anything, but nope, no sound from the buzzer what so ever. Maybe it's not meant to arrive today. So I took my shower, got ready (dengan mata bengkak dan gatal macam siut je kan) and went out to go to the post office. Before I got out the main door of our building, I took a peek at our postbox. And guess what. GUESS WHAT MY DEAR FRIENDS. THERE IT WAS ANOTHER NOTICE TIMED 11.20AM SAYING I WASN'T AT HOME TO RECEIVE MY MAIL. KEPALA HOTAK MAKCIK DIA LAWA!!!


I took both of the cards and went to post office, hari ni dah la panas gila jalan berpeluh2, and when I got there obviously I could only get the first parcel sebab the other parcel tak sampai lagi. BODOH!! That's what I said to the man, kesian dia tak bersalah. Yes I said "bodoh" to him. Mampus dia la nak paham ke tak, ternganga dia tengok. I told him "Am I suppose to come here EVERY FUCKING SINGLE DAY TO GET MY PARCEL?! DON'T PAY THE POSTMAN THEN!! I am not going to ask for a stupid redelivery system!! Useless!!"

Dah jalan keluar dah nak sampai John Lewis dah tiba-tiba nampak van Royal Mail. Probably bringing today's UNDELIVERED STUFF to the post office. MALAS AKU NAK ULANG BALIK KE SANA, sekali takda macam mana. EEE BANGANG TAU TAK BANGANG!! ALL MY WIRES ARE SUPPOSE TO GET HERE TODAY!!!! TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HARINIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!

Decided to get Frappucino to cool me down and some KFC. Sampai rumah nak makan KFC pun rasa boleh muntah balik sebab bengang sangat dengan postman ni. EEEEEEEEEEE MEH SINI TENGOK SIKIT MUKA DIA!! HANDSOME KE TAK HANDSOME KE MAMPOS KAU!! Urggggghhhhhhhh please excuse me, memang tengah bengang to the ultimate.

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New Page

On the right you will see the heading "Pages" and a new page has finally been created for my dear jewelries. Haha. Finally. I'll be uploading most of my handmade jewelries, those that I think are marketable and doesn't show my amateur skills AS MUCH. :') So those who want to take a look go ahead and I will be keeping the page updated as my designs are freshly made, so keep an eye out for them. Hihihi.

Owh and yes please, feel free to comment. :)

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It's a bit late but..




Hehehehe :)

Exam was alright. The second paper was a killer and I even dreamt I failed the paper!!!!!!!! :(((((( Then on Friday we got to know if we were exempted from that PP3 practical exam. You know how they do it, ala X Factor or American Idol gitu. They split us up in two different rooms and everyone in a particular room will get the same results.

I was with a few belas people, and suddenly the technician came in and said "Ok you're exempted!!". Just like that. We were like jumping around and shouting all over the room!! Like how you would see in X Factor!! Hahaha someone even shouted "Where's Simon Cowell??!!" It was THAT good to be able to NOT take the exam. :) I feel bad for K and Morv though. They could hear us screaming through the door. But it's okay, they can do it next week!

Masalahnya, kalau exempt ke tak exempt ke my marks tak dikira dalam my year average marks. Dapat first grade pun takda beza. Kurang hasam tak??!! Aku dah buat elok-elok so that dia boleh save markah-markah aku yang lain yang macam longkang, sekali dia kata tak dikira. Mr Bang jumpa Mrs Ang. Dia bagi credit mark je. Siut betul, aku spend beratus-ratus jam dari first half of the term and dia tak kira markah, kasi 20 credit mark je. Bongok.

Tau alasan dia sebab apa. Sebab ramai orang akan fail and so jadi tak fair sebab akan bawak turun markah diorang. SIAPA SURUH DIORANG FAIL?! No like really, fair ke tak fair. The course is for 20 credit marks, adakah anda patut fail, ANY course for that matter. I mean ye la kan, 3rd year ni semua course 20 credits, but kenapa nak discriminate practical niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii... Hello, manufacturing tu lagi ramai orang akan fail ok, so tak payah la kira yang itu jugak kalau camtu!
:''((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( Tak nampak ni tarik muka extreme!
Sedih tau sedih. Jahat!

Anyway, takpa la kut. Kita tawakkal je la.

Just got back home after makan-makan and laughed effing out loud watching Mario Mariono Bros? Or something like that? God.. Lawak nak mati cerita ni!!!!!! You could see my gut through my mouth and brain through my nose sebab gelak teruk sangat. It's like raw comedy tau. Definitely had a good laugh. Lagi-lagi exams are finished. *SMUG*

And when I got back home, bumped into Ustream live of Wonder Girls MV Premier? Haha orang habis exam, takda kerja. At least I watched a premier, whatever it is. :) Its cool, but short. Teringat Kaklong and Izura, Wonder Cuuuuurrrrlllss. Hahaha! Ok, inside joke, sorry.

I'm gonna have to start making my jewelries. Sharpen my skills. Lagipun it's not that cold now to be sprawling on the floor with my jewelry stuff. Even my jewelry-making corner in the room dah berhabuk. Mana boleh vacuum, habis la all my stones nanti. Hahah. But yea, I've got quite a number of designs from MONTHS back, sekarang baru nak buat and catalogue them and price them. Most of them takda prices lagi, macam mana orang nak beli betul tak?! Nanti I'll put the pictures up ok? Still contemplating on making a blog sale. Hmmmm. Tengok dulu bagaimana. ;)

Owh God, just remembered I have to pack up all my stuff dah. :( Yes, I'll be moving to Taunton, Somerset soon enough and will be emptying my room. Of course I won't be bringing ALL my stuff down to Taunton, gila ke apa. I'll be meeting up with the lady next Tuesday. Day trip to Taunton, hope all will be well. Masalahnya NI number ni tak dapat-dapat lagi. Padan muka, apply lambat lagi. Owh, the mak cik ada kucing!!!!!!!!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG. Ok calm meow.

And I do NOT know why my parents kept on asking if she's gonna give me breakfast. Mum, Dad, I won't be staying at B&B. (=.=) Owh Dad says he can chip in sikit because currency dah turun. Hihihi but I'll save that for later. Maybe like bila nak BELI KERETA ke. Hahaha. And he offered to get a new laptop since I'm going on to my final year. Alhamdulillah. Sorry ya baby HP, you're such a nuisance now although I lap you vewy much.

It's 3 am dah. Better go to sleep. Say NO to microwaved milk. Huhu.

I'm out.

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Mata Exam Ikan

It's Saturday dah. :(( Which means tomorrow is Sunday. Which means the next day is Monday. Which means I'm gonna have my first paper at exactly 2.00PM!!! Yo yo 2pm! Haha so out of the picture. Anyway, yea. I'm scared out of my wits for my finals. Have no idea why. Maybe its because I need to do REALLY well to pass to 4th year. OMG 3rd year is such an anjing.

I can't believe I've successfully make trips to the library every single morning sampai ke petang. Smug. And this time tactic bertukar as I won't be rushing to get a table that I like. Instead, I'll get a computer. Haha tak ramai sangat orang guna computer pagi buta so I get to choose where and which computer to use. Smart kan? HAHAHAHA.

Okay dah. Side note: Charger laptop MASIH belum sampai.

I think I've been a bit aggressive on my eyes lately. Asyik duduk depan computer je or malam2 trying to surf the net through my small iPod touch ni or my phone. It is small la kan compared to a laptop. And so my mata now dah bengkak and red and I think something is coming out. Hehe sounds icky I know. But yea, need to get myself eye drops. I'm a good example of low patient compliance sebab if I buy the full bottle eye drop tu I'll use it once or twice and won't use it until 3 months after! Mana boleh! 'Please discard after 28 days'!! Kena cari yang one time use tu je. Owh and I've stopped wearing my contact lenses walaupun dia tulis situ 'Contains hydrogen silicone, making it a breatheable contact lens!' Whatever.

Mungkin sebelum ni I've been a bit kuno or just couldn't care. But last few months I was browsing through android punya apps ni and I've been reading reviews on what provider gives a cheap international text and almost everyone says fishtext is good. So I've been using it and I SAVED TONES! Message Msia 2 pence je. T.T Apsal tahun2 sebelum ni tak pernah tau pun. Orang duk sibuk suruh guna skype and everything. Kalau takda cukup texts in your tariffs, message UK number pun 2 pence je! I think. I don't know, just check sendiri lah. Google je. :)

Ok need to stop rambling and start with my studying. :) :( GOOD MORNING!! Nice nice sunny day.

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Bank holiday

Bank holiday today! Doesn't make a difference pun. Hmph

Finally there's sun (but its 0 degree C!) and hopefully plenty more this week. Last week have been terrible. :(

Going to Strathclyde park to enjoy the sun, while studying. Extremely worried of my papers this time.

Owh. That's me own Costa! ;) Also made scrambled eggs tadi and realised milk dah habis so I put whipped cream instead. XD

P/s I'm still blogging from my phone. Thank God for technology. But bought my charger from eBay dah for 10 quid. Thank God again for online shopping.

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B Scare

Apparently there was a bomb scare in our uni library just now!

There were police dogs. And then more police came! They came to our department as well since some of the chemicals have gone lost? I don't know. Seriously, such drama. They should postpone our exams! ;p

Anyway, now I'm in the library. No it's not blown into ashes. -.-

Everything ok now, I hope. InsyaAllah. Hehe. Back to studying!!

My laptop's charger is broken. :((((((

I'm singing "At night they would go walking till the breaking of the day. The morning is for sleeping." Guess what song.

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Drinking milk to put me to sleeeeep.

No I didn't drug it.

My laptop is broken just this morning. Siigh. What a day.

Sent from my HTC

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I have exams coming.

The End.

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Spidey bit me again?

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I would do anything to go back home right now.


Time won't allow me.

And maybe in the future, I would be glad I didn't.

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Whipped Cream

I've decided
Nama dia 'Cream'
Kalau dia marah dia jadi 'Whipping cream'
Kalau dia happy dia jadi 'Double cream'
Kalau dia extremely happy jadi 'Sprinkles on top'
Kalau dia sedih dia jadi 'Whipped cream'
Kalau dia random dia jadi 'Milk'

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Temperature today was 14C. So I decided to finally go to Crookston to find where the heck my hospital placement is. Relaxing walk, I had. There was a park nearby as well but I didn't take any photos. Hehe.

See, it's a clear sky. Takda pun haze so don't fret. But I bet the small "glassy" particles are everywhere. *shivers*

I'm starting to get tired easily with this warm weather.

Big fat reminder to self: Start drinking your juices!

A song is currently on repeat in my head right now. And it's quite a depressing song I might say, but it's relaxing, so what the heck.

Y'all know how I love Hyori. This one is called Want Me Back. Love the beginning, "It's. O. Ver." :) Again this has nothing to do with my current life situation, it's just me liking this song so my dear friends pls don't go psycho on me and ask what happened. I love you all! :))

credits to alexiiiaaaable

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