Finally

I'm finally typing on my computer keyboard! No more touch touch blog blog through my phone. phewh. Thank you to Mr Takeng. *bukan taking ok.


Actually it's been awhile since it was fixed tapi macam so occupied. First week of semester is never a relaxing one for me. You'd think there would be no labs, classes won't start yet. But not for me. How lucky.

Rindu zaman matrix masa first week je sure semua malas nak pergi class. Towards end of semester pun malas jugak. Haha! Nasib.

Talking 'bout my dear laptop, masih responsible jadi lawn mower. But less worse I would say. Got a 'tingkap' 7. And it's working great! Except tak boleh guna iTunes. If not dia mula buat perangai. Sometimes it's a bit slow but I can manage and not ask her to work much. Games and pictures sempat di-save-kan. Alhamdulillah. Kalau tak mampus aku nak update my jewelry price list.

Talked to Mum just now. She spoke about her jewelry project with Izura. Terasa jealous pulak. I don't really have the time to do my jewelry. What a pity. I WANT TO DO JEWELRY! But she gave few ideas and I guess I have to start sooner or later. If not buat rugi duit je she bought all the stuff for me and goes through the trouble of giving me her 16 gauge copper wire, whereas I only need them to make lockets, she and Izura makes brooches. I'm still unsuccessful in making brooches but Mum gave me few ideas already. Will try when I have time.

Miss home, miss everyone back home, miss all the cats whether I've seen them or know them, or not. Miss friends, miss going out in the warm sun (not too much because sun dia tak friendly, panas melebih). Miss me love. Everyone seems busy, I feel left out. Or maybe I don't really keep in touch. Takpa lah if they say that 'bout me. I know my cousin Azrina understands me on that.

I'm seriously worried. My results are not out yet; I don't think I did well. I don't think I'll do well. Macam mana ni!!!! Strive strive strive. Dah 3rd year ok. What does it take for me to realise that I'll be done with all this soon, if and only if I do well. It doesn't need a rocket scientist to figure that out: DO WELL!!

Haven't heard from you for almost a week. I wonder if you realise that.

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Happy Bday Mum


I missed the family dinner, everyone else was there. It's ok I guess.

Miss you and love all of you.

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Home

Sigh

I wanna go home.

Or home can come to me.

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Getting married??

Yes I'm getting married.


Not until atleast 25 that is!

Haha. It's just an impression. Don't go talking that I'm goin to get married soon.

Teringat zaman sekolah kalau stress nak exam je sure all the girls will.complain and say, "nak kawen je lah! Kan senang! Xpyh exam exam."

Haha yeah right ladies. Ingat isteri zaman modern tak boleh/payah amek exam?

But that was early teens time. Omg did I just say that? Haha. Whatever, I'm having a headache.

Dear Headache,
Don't come and visit me now or i'll straight forward and mistreat u with profen.

Thank you. Won't love you.


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Crazy!

Ok, bangun pagi dengar construction bising kat depan rumah. Sejuk2 pun nak kerja ke? On a Sunday plak tu!

Pastu now I can't think of food. Or i'll start thinking of those that I can't get. Nak oreo cheese cake Secret Recipe, nak food from Dome, Bestnya sejuk2 ni dapat makan the mushroom pie tu and the carrot to best nya I can just imagine. Omg I have to stop!

And tadi I went through my cousin's photos and ada la dia pandai betul taruk dia makan waffles with nutella and whipped cream OMYGOODNESS!! I'm talking in one long sentence without a full stop! Somebody slap me!

Kenapa ni? Exam esok ok, think straight!

Wish me luck and pray for my success.



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Is that how it feels like?

Everything is twisted now.

It's funny when you're looking from outside the window, or maybe up a hill, or from a high tower; and you see everything. And you can judge rightfully. Wouldn't you? Couldn't you?

And to witness everything being rightfully and wrongly treated; I can't say the feelings I have. A cocktail, yet again.

I can laugh because how foolish people can be.

I can pity them, how blind can they be?

I can ignore on how ignorant they can be.

I refuse to see on how they are given poison after giving honey.

I can even feel sick and disgusted.

On how things lurk around your fingers just the way you want them to. They are your slaves, your dolls.

They become what you've made them, spoiled them.

Yet. Who am i? A spectator of your magnificient play? You put up beautiful settings, nice magical curtains, grand chandeliers, polished windows and woven carpet.

And your dolls come in and took our right minds away. Makes me laugh at their silliness. Putting nice and also bitter words in their mouths. A beautiful, nasty storyline.

Or. Am I also a part of it? Feelings that I feel are a part of your play. The audience is in your hands as well?

Smart.

But not wise, mister.

Because you are no Creator.

God is.




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Pity

Nobody is perfect.

But pity those who doesn't know what's the truth and what is false.

I won't be mean. But for a friend, I'll laugh in your face like it's the last thing I do!

You'll see when the time comes..


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Ke tepi!


I don't know if that's the end of u.

But uve done me no use anymore.

And so I've put u aside, with an ultimately heavy heart despite the sad ending we had.

For now, I'm blogging from my phone. How 'great' ada ciptaan mcm ni.

Farewell for now, 2 year old laptop.


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Lesson


Walaupun 85% success rate setiap kali study last minute, jangan percaya 100% kerana ada 15% lagi. :)

December was no joke. 
Four days into the new year is even nonsensical. To the max.

Although not observant, things can be seen when it's obvious. Even a blind man can sense. 

How do I put it nicely? Benda-benda yang you think is fictional actually happens in real life! And how lucky I am to not be a victim, but a witness. Wait, ada jugak jadi mangsa but I don't give a Joule

For all sorts of matter that is BEYOND ridiculous...

Nasib baik makhluk-makhluk Tuhan tersebut kerana I'm considered as a person yang forgiving la katakan. As long as it doesn't reach beyond limits, then talking behind me won't affect me. Better be a man than a mouse and just plainly man up and come up front, right? 

Not praising myself but judging from these insane happenings, reactions would vary. 
One is forgiving, another dwelling, and most crucially explosion
Which are you? Not from what you think you are, from what you've actually done.

I would understand why statements and tuduhan(s) of me (and loads and loads of people I care around me) would come out from those mouths. If I were them I would probably do the same, no kidding.

And that is what God is showing to me, to us, to everyone. Other people's experience is a lesson for others. We learn from each other.

If and when such events were to happen to us, 
investigate, investigate and investigate. 

If you say it doesn't bother you and couldn't be bothered to waste your time researching your ass out, 
then act like so. 

Never dwell especially on things you don't even know true or not, 
or everyone would think you're a psycho, especially those who know better. Tak ke malu?

Especially when you're saying you're at a better level, reflect what you're saying,
and are you really better? 

I'm sick and actually surprised, a cocktail of emotions, that all sorts and types of human being with different backgrounds and education and well-being etc. would actually end up doing the same ol' dirt. Talking 'bout other people behind their backs. I admit I've done them. Name it. Back in primary, high school, in college, in Uni, here. Just name it. You're a really, ultimately, a good person if you haven't. 

Just mentioning this generally, it could be about myself. Bak kata Mummy, "Terang tang tang!!!" :)) Harus ada sound effect.... I miss Mum.

Take it with a pinch of salt. No one knows what's the naked truth.

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No more




No more Gordon the Fat Cat. :(

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