Sketch Book

I'll be back

2011-10-27T18:48:00.001+01:00

Putus

2011-10-10T20:20:00.003+01:00

Only 2 months and I'm already like this.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE what I'm doing. And everything is going as planned.

But at times, I just feel so tired. Like I wanna give up my dreams. And just go home. :'(

I miss Mum, Dad, and everyone back home.

Lazy

2011-09-14T21:54:00.003+01:00

No more of that appetite. Too lazy. :(

What I know is Hugo has LOADS of appetite, he's eating all the time and has grown so much. Awwwwww.

Just saying

2011-09-05T19:30:00.001+01:00

Feeling a bit depressed.

Hugo seems like he understands and is trying to cheer me up.

I miss everyone back home.

This year will be ok. InsyaAllah.

I need to be strong.

New Baby

2011-09-04T21:10:00.004+01:00

Someone gave me a new baby. :)

Introducing... Hugo

Not as lonely now anymore. :) Love him to bits!

Dusting

2011-08-26T19:03:00.002+01:00

LOOK AT ALL THE DUST IN HERE OMG.

Last time we checked I was graduating. And now look, I'm working!! With my first payroll just came in. Haha hello Estee Lauder. (No I'm not working with them. I'm working with Boots!)

In Plymouth now, in a really nice and cozy flat. Work has been ok. Weather here is just the same as Glasgow I would say, only a few degrees warmer. I'm definitely tanned. No more sirens passing through here and there. Instead I have seagulls tapping on my roof every morning in the weekend just to piss me off. Pfft.

Anyway, as happy as I am starting a new life, I'm really utterly sad for reasons only God knows. As Mum reminded me, I've been doing this for four year now, and counting. Another year won't be hard. I will be stepping into another new life, insyaAllah. We will see. ;)

I love you all regardless of checking or not checking my blog for updates. MWAH!! haha

A Graduate!

2011-06-03T23:27:00.002+01:00

I am now a Pharmacy graduate!!!! OMG

Very much feel thankful and glad to Allah swt for granting me to pass my program. After four years of struggles and even laziness, I have passed all my papers and able to GRADUATE!

Now should I ignore all the angry and sad and anxious posts I've shared with you here. I don't think I should. They're memories that I share with my readers and myself. :)

Alhamdulillah. Now I understand when people say you'll feel relieved. I was relieved to my bones and even cried happy tears when I can't thank Allah enough.

Thank you family and friends too and all of you!!! (macam buat receiving award speech pulok. HAHA)

But this IS an award.

It's called MPharm. :)

Egg Shells

2011-05-31T02:27:00.004+01:00

Sigh dunia dah ber-facebook ni susah betul.

When was ever your silaturrahim with someone is determined by your friends list? Cuba cakap sikit.

I feel like I'm walking on egg shells. Kita nak share 'What's on your mind?' kat status tu pun kena pikir perasaan orang lain sebab kita tau obviously dia akan terasa (sebab dia suka makan cili. Orang makan cili dia la terasa, betul tak?).

And so mula lah conflict diri:

"Eh tulis je lah. Tulis macam biasa je status tu, biar la kalau diorang terasa. Bukannya niat kita pun"

"Eh especially after what happened, it happened for a reason. Allah nak tunjuk kita a few strong points. Oleh itu kena la pikir before tulis status tu. Better not hurt people with your selfish needs. Lagi2 kononnya nak terasa tu diorang lagi tua, haruslah hormati orang tua"

So in the end siapa yang pening? Sila vote.

Saya belia! Hehehe. Katakan TAK NAK ya. #wtf

Yang penting, you can't choose who you want to get attention from. Perlukan kasih sayang tapi selective pulak. Pastu tak dapat, buat tantrum stupid. Beggars can't be choosers. #lagiwtf

"Kalau dah satu group pikir macam tu, memang diorang pergi mana2 pun jalan bawah tempurung diorang jugak". Betul tu, tak keluar2. Bak kata Mr Rama, pikiran tu dah tertutup! (with hand motion)

Yang penting (also), blood is thicker than water. Everyone knows that. Literally speaking and also in terms of family bond. Generally speaking la kan, who wouldn't do anything once they see parents/siblings being hurt, especially when shedding tears. Bukannya hari2 tengok air mata mereka, tapi when it happens, of course as a family member we can't help but feel helpless and tersebak.

Even if diorang tak terasa pun, but because we love them SOOOOOO much, kita pulak yang terasa lebih. I remember some random guy showed his middle finger to my dad. I was like WTF WEYH APA MASALAH KAU TAK RETI RESPECT ORANG TUA KE WEYH. My dad being him, jalan relax je buat tak tau. Ni stranger ni. Kalau kawan buat, memang dah putus kawan dah kita. Tak kisah la middle finger ke apa ke. Yang penting (lagi?) dia dah cross the mother fucking line.

Speaking of blood,

MY MUM WILL BE ARRIVING IN LIKE 12 HOURS!!! I CANNOT WAIT!!!!

Dah la. I honestly have a lot more to vent out. But feel that its inappropriate. Ni pun dah over dah ni. Its better to keep most of my words than attend to my selfish needs because honestly saya lebih suka hormati orang tua. Like I said, like walking on egg shells.

#fml

2011-05-27T21:17:00.001+01:00

Seriously...

Bila kita niat baik, orang tipu belakang, tepek muka kita, pijak kepala kita.

Don't know who to trust dah in my quiet world.

I know I said I didn't sign up for this, but I was prepared as a supporter. And actually without realising it I signed up for the ups and downs, good and bad. (it's not like I'm married or anything, but that's just me as a person). Buat apa nak niat buruk. Penat tau. Baik buat baik je, and all will be ok.

And yet. Look at me. What and where did I go wrong.

#fml

BMI

2011-05-15T13:58:00.003+01:00

I've gained weight! And reached my target of being a little over 50 kg! :D :D

And so my BMI increased from 18 (underweight) to 21 (ideal?)! Yeayers!

Let's celebrate before it goes back down!!!!!!!!!

Honesty by Beyonce

2011-05-14T11:55:00.002+01:00

**********

If you search

For tenderness

It isn't hard to find

You can have the love

You need to live

But if you look

For truthfulness

You might just

As well be blind

It always seems to be

So hard to give

Honesty

Is such a lonely word

Everyone is so untrue

Honesty

Is hardly ever heard

And mostly

What I need from you

I can always

Find someone

To say

They sympathize

If I wear my heart

Out on my sleeve

But I don't want

Some pretty face

To tell me

Pretty lies

All I want

Is someone

To believe

I can find a lover

I can find a friend

I can have security

Until the bitter end

Anyone can comfort me

With promises again

I know, I know

When I'm deep

Inside of me

Don't be

Too concerned

I won't ask

For nothin'

While I'm gone

But when I want

Sincerity

Tell me where else

Can I turn

Because

You're the one

That I depend upon

**********

What did I do wrong to deserve such untruthfulness.

Done

2011-05-10T19:17:00.002+01:00

I'm done with my final paper or final year, ever!!!!

Whoopieee dooo daaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!

Jom keluar ini malam. Tadi dah lepak2 ngan classmates. hoyeahhhhh.

Skype

2011-05-01T21:31:00.004+01:00

Ok so I'm sooooooo kuno. And so I've only just re-re-re-rediscovered my forgotten password for skype. EHEHEH. During Ayesha's birthday, A, Dania and I decided to SKYPE!!! Such a dumbo I am, semua benda tak reti. So here are the NICE pictures. They took soooooo many pictures of me in my bimbo mode.

Piece!

When the sun was glaring (only on my side of the globe) we decided to have picnic!

Later that night when D was snoozing off, A was past her bedtime but decided to continue on.

Anywayyyy, Tuesday will be Day 1 of my final finals. DAMN! Did I tell you it'll be four of them on consecutive days?? Siiigh, I'll be dead by Friday. Yawwwww.

Flat

2011-04-22T19:31:00.001+01:00

I CANNOT believe I'm Youtube-ing videos on common exercises to flatten my tummy.

Yes. Flat tummy no more. I have love handles, omg. And bum is big (not new but it's back, girls!)

Healthy lifestyle, let's go!!

*finishing chocolates first*

Millen

2011-04-20T20:44:00.002+01:00

Went shopping at Livingston last week. And my God of all things, I got myself a 7 piece Tefal set. Sigh. Konon for my future. Muahaha. It was ON SALE! All that for 45pounds only. Also, ada steamer yang bertingkat2 tu for 20pounds only, and and and toaster yang toast 4 breads at a time tu for 15pounds. ALL TEFAL I TELL YOU. And also fast cooker, from 120 to 20 pounds only. Tapi nasib la perempuan ni tak reti nak masak sangat. Tak reti nak guna fast cooker. Hehehe only to find out later that it MIGHT be something like pressure cooker. Sigh. MENYESAL TAK BELI! Nanti my Mum datang for summer mungkin boleh cuba try test kan? Damn it. Damn damn damn baru sedar.

Anyway, grad ball is early June nanti. (Exam belum start pun dah pikir grad ball) Chis. So whilst in Livingston, dropped by Karen Millen yang tengah sale gila babi. I know the collection there is soooo much better than in the city centre. Found a few yang kononnya would suit me. But but but, bontot dah besar sangat!! Mister terpaksa tunggu lama for me to fit into one dress. Then gave another one yang should look ok tapi sebab banyak layerings kat bawah tu, so bontot nampak lebih besar. Damn. I should diet!!! Tengah nak exam ni, I'm always munching munching and munching.

Was cleaning my wardrobe just now and saw all the jeans that I haven't worn for a few months/years. Mana tak sayang tu boleh la potong and wear for spring/summer ni. So far the weather have been REALLY good, but I'm wearing my sunnies indoors. Hehe. Anyway, then found my all time fav Evisu skinny jeans yang dah kecut two years back. Didn't know it was there till tadi. All this time I thought I left it at home in Msia sebab obviously I can't fit into it anymore. So tadi gatal nak try jugak, in the end had cramps. T.T Who in this world have cramps while trying out jeans??!! Maybe ada but not anyone I know of. (OMG please tell me if you do so that I won't feel like I'm alone) Hehe. It was size 27" AND shrunken. So obviously la kan tak muat. I now wear 28" comfortably without the 'biar derita asal jelita' phrase repeating in my head by Kaklong's voice.

Back to studying. Tomorrow is my OSCE. OMG, 30 marks is on good communication and 20 on my clinical knowledge. Can I just smile and ask questions then? Hehehehe.

Fatty

2011-03-30T19:08:00.003+01:00

I'm becoming a fatty bom bom! With the stress building up with my dissertation that's due this Friday, I'll be done for! I'm munching and typing at the same time. Malas nya nak buat ayat konon genius. (=.=)'

Can't wait to get this over and done with and we'll partay this weekend like never before. :)

True

2011-03-23T11:28:00.000Z

I can be myself again.

I've put away my mask.

And it feels good.

Karaoke

2011-03-13T22:16:00.001Z

Karaoke all day long under the duvet. It's like we're on holiday. :)

Bed

2011-03-11T11:24:00.001Z

I'm blogging through my phone today. Why? Because I'm unwell. Pretty much stuck in bed now.

My panadol dah finish. Everything I eat, it'll come back out. My sinus pain is getting unbearable. Along with my head. I need Sudafed. I'm too tired to walk out. Too tired to get myself water. My eyes are about to close again despite dah tido more than 12hrs.

I've been sleeping day n night. I shouldn't be, right? Or it'll get worse, wouldn't it? But memang x larat. Bangun pagi terus nangis, because I'm mengada when it comes to fever and blocked nose. Hehe.

Owh how I wish Mum is here. :'(

P/s: Japan just got hit by a 8.9 magnitude earthquake and tsunami just after. I pray for everyone's safety and may God protect us all. All other close countries might get high rises in tide. Stay safe.

Getaway

2011-03-05T22:21:00.003Z

Now that most of my work is done, I need a getaway.

Let me have my room to breathe nowwww. :)

Credit: smokeybarz

A Month

2011-02-27T23:12:00.002Z

So yea, I've been a lazy blogger. T.T

Loads have been happening. What do you expect. More and more deadlines to catch up. Teera has left me alone :(. Weather is getting nicer. Sleep is getting less. But I still treat my weekends like how they're meant to. ;)

Cheers for end of March please! That's when my dissertation is due and after that we will partay and continue studying for finals!

Damn I haven't registered for graduation.

Farewell

2011-01-28T15:37:00.004Z

Tonight, Teera and I will have our last cucuk-cucuk night getaway. I'm so sad that she'll be going back home, but happy at the same time. Now she's Dr Teera. Hehe.

During Corinthian night out, together berangan-ing to be the rich and famous that only visit Corinthian.

Halloween 2010!

Farewell and we will catch up next time in Malaysia! :)

Final

2011-01-27T23:56:00.001Z

Final semester!! Like, ever!

Pray that I do well and that I will graduate on the 1st of July 2011. InsyaAllah. :)

Let's go! Bring it on!

Unreal

2011-01-23T02:00:00.002Z

I'm blogging from my phone. Yet I'm always in front of my computer.

I received bad news today. Know how I told that I've really enjoyed last summer during intern and everyone that I've met and every place that I visited will always be cherished in my heart. Especially those I've met at work.

I'm currently lying in bed with the loud music from the club next door while in tears. My beloved n great tutor from my internship, Lindsay, have passed away on the first week of January.

I could not believe my eyes when I read the message and was wishing that Ellie made a typo. But sadly, its the truth.

Even for only two months, she has made a great impact in my life. She was a young n healthy lady, a professional pharmacist, a dedicated mother, a very good friend. However God is great n took her life as she suffered from stroke and later was in coma on Xmas.

I should've made that visit when I was down in London. I should've at least send a message for Xmas. Sad sad news this is, I feel as if I cannot accept it. But it must be nothing compared to the colleagues there and to her family.

RIP Lindsay.

From left: Lindsay, Me, Rowena and Jane. On my last day of work in Norton.

Space

2010-12-25T18:11:00.001Z

Yes. I stare into space occasionally, unintentionally.

Like a slap in the face it was.

Wish

2010-12-23T23:44:00.001Z

In London now and blogging from my phone while watching 'celebrity juice' on the sofa bed, occasionally wishing I'm not beating myself over an invisible tight rope I tied me self with to tree.

Eff this.

I'm wishing for a more refreshing year with no shits. Considering I'll be graduating in a few months time and starting anew with a job at a totally new place, I don't know if it'll be refreshing or just as shitty.

Saw a photo of me months back on me holiday with friends and wondered how I put that mask on so nicely. Even on a lone trip, what was that doing, still on? What about now?

Just having a moment. Cheers for a new happy year. Happy holidays! xo

Happy Birthday, Ariz!

2010-12-07T19:25:00.003Z

It's Ariz's birthday today!

"I had chocolate cake with Spiderman on top! Got webs also! But then, not enough anymore to share.."

Beast

2010-12-05T00:17:00.003Z

Watched Beauty and The Beast just now. (and cried, hehehe)

Flash

2010-12-01T20:37:00.002Z

So weird.

That was the first time that all the good moments I had with friends flashed through my mind during my 5 minutes of unconsciousness.

I opened my eyes and thought, "What am I doing here?"

Am I in deep shit?

Posto

2010-11-30T15:50:00.003Z

Guess what I got in my mail box this evening??

The famous writing. :) Tak payah tengok who's the sender pun I would know.

Aww. Love them gifts!

Thank you very much NJ! I know you stalk my blog so this entry is dedicated to you. :)

And yes, its snowing heavily here. "Let it Snow!"

Nausea

2010-11-29T12:25:00.002Z

I'm. Feeling. Nauseous.

Must be due to the shock of cold weather.

I have a class test this Friday and I haven't started studying.

Head is too heavy and my insides feel like coming out. I don't have them damn butterflies, I have them slugs!

Run then Pause

2010-11-27T22:18:00.004Z

So many things have been happening. I've just realised there were lots of tagged pictures of me on my Facebook over last weekend, and it was (obviously) only over the weekend!

We went to Corinthian, like I said. And it was the night of Teera's birthday!! It was alright, to be honest the DJ wasn't doing a good job. So we went downstairs and enjoyed till late! By the time we went out, it was foggy, surprisingly quiet as everyone else finishes an hour earlier, AND our feet hurts! We literally just walked over 100m and had to sit at the pavement to take a rest. :D The next day: Open house raya. Kekeke

Macam TV sitcom melayu wannabe tak? Hehehe

Teera and I after having one of our best night outs of the YEAR.

I had to go to Edinburgh on Wednesday for my hospital attachment. I had to take the half past 7 train and then take the bus to the hospital which I am soooooo hopeless at, taking a bus! It also meant I had to wake up early. BLUEKH. After I've reached Edinburgh, the bus I was expecting didn't turn up! And suddenly a big red bus was approaching with a big sign on top, "Western Genaral (H)". I was like, "YES! Let's just hop on this one!". Then I asked the driver, "Could you tell me the stop for Western General?" and he replied, "Neh, you'll see it. It's huge!". Ok whatever. I reached there right on time and met my partner, only to be told by the staff "We

didn't expect you until 10!". OK again. Well at least I don't have to wake up as early next week.

Anyway, my deadline was coming near for my draft intro and honestly I was stressed out because I've reached over the maximum. There's just too much to mention on warfarin. Boring notes aside, I made it through! We had to put our draft into Turnitin, to evaluate the originality of our reports and minimize plagiarism. I had 13% which is OK since we need to get less than 15%.

We also went to the pre-opening of Uncle Kush and Aunty Ahnis's cafe called Kafe Wau! I feel that it'll be a great place and my prayers are with them and the cafe! I can feel it in my bones. :) Despite the cold weather, we took 'Three Steps to Heaven'. It was heavenly.

Us at the cafe. Behind the counter but acting like customers! Haha

Heavenly heaven. Especially in the cold weather.

And right before Glasgow Games 2010, it snowed. Terribly. Like a blizzard! This is the first time I've seen Glasgow white on the first fall of snow! I peeked outside my window and some people were walking backwards cause the wind was too strong to face! Poor them Friday night out go-ers.

Pre-GG10. The weather was super cold but the sun and sky was awesome! Rare occasion, that was.

The boys clearing up the pitch for football.

I wouldn't actually say it was a good two weeks or so. But it was definitely 'full of life'. As if I've got nothing better to do la kan. I've got a major class test next Friday and I haven't started shit. And I'm already catching a cold since it was so bloody sejuk today during GG10 and couldn't feel my toes at all! Up to my ankles!! And now that I've got a cold, I'm growing impatient and grumpy and cranky. Great! :)

Imma take my sleep now (with Walkabout blaring across the road and the abangs kakaks pakciks and makciks singing their throats out the karaoke bar downstairs.) Just great! :)

Corinthian

2010-11-18T22:33:00.002Z

Blog posts setakat ni semua emotional. Tak patut tak patut.

Friday ni going to The Corinthian with the Greeks! Weeeehoooooooo.

Never actually been to the place and tengok dari luar je selalu especially since I was neighbours dengan Corinthian ni during first year. hehe. Orang posh2 je pergi, atas kepala pun kena ada bunga. huahuahua. Oleh itu, my preparation dah siap. Dress dah beli, kasut pakai je la apa yang ada.

:D :D :D

Good news. I got a new baby nephew!! His name is Alif. :) Can't wait to meet him! Ntah bila la tu :( Prolly when he's already running about. Hoho.

Will post up pictures from Corinthian. (tengah pikir orang2 kat Corinthian bawak ke camera pun?? Hmmmmm)

Frustration

2010-11-12T22:10:00.002Z

The feeling of not able to turn anywhere and just be myself and just be on my own. To just let your emotions go and allow them to burst. Sometimes I feel like walking around town at night, but I don't live by the river anymore to get fresh air. And I don't take nicotine anymore like the Cheryl Tweedy in me, so that's a bit worthless. Can't even cry in the rain cause its too cold! Haha.

I was really really, extremely upset yesterday with a friend who's forgotten his promise. It's not what I would call a 'promise' but if I say the word then I'd let the cat out of the bag. And I don't want that to happen because he's a good friend of mine. I needed to get it out of my system, but to whom? Not anyone here, or the news would start again. Fuck, this is complicated. I hate that trait of him. What the fuck is he thinking of now?? Is he just going to take advantage of all this??

I'm not the type of person to confront someone. Unless it's really extreme. I'm not a strong person. I'll be the helpless ostrich among the bunch, slamming my head into the ground just to hide away from problems and thinking they would solve on their own. I can't even be strong for my friends even when they needed me the most. And I'll be the selfish one to look for their comfort and support. I'm talking bull crap.

I feel like I need my own space, to just be alone, to keep in touch with myself. And now I miss my lone-ventures. Going to new places and breathe in their air and not care of anything. I went through the pictures of me going to Devon, they were gorgeous. I miss the places. Memories are only excuses. These, are good experiences.

Hate is more of what I'm feeling now.

Drained out Weekend

2010-11-08T21:33:00.003Z

So I went to Nottingham Games this year for the second time ever since my first year. :) Glad to say we managed to get THREE buses from Glasgow! And I heard Edinburgh had one bus. Whooping four buses from Scotland.

Trip was nice. We left at 11pm Friday night after the fireworks display. OBVIOUSLY too early to leave as trip to Notts should only take us 6-ish hours. So yea, plus the rempit driving of the three buses, we managed to get our butts in front of the Sports Centre at 4.50am. YES! It was freakin' cold and we had no where to go.

We bumped into two of the committees and they said they could arrange the SC to open early at 5.30am. Our drivers are getting anxious as they wanted to leave and take a nap. How helpful! So we sorted out everyone's breakfasts and got out of the bus about 5.30am like promised, only to be told the SC could not be opened, and can only be done so at 7am. Bummer. What's worse was that all three buses left! Hmph.

So we were told by that committee person that we could walk to Portland Building for 20-ish minutes or wait till 7am for the SC to open. We decided to walk because I swear it was colder than Glasgow at that point! IT WASN'T EVEN 20 MINUTES! Over betul. It was less than 10 minutes.

We got to the PB with some persuading of the security and got all 140 people into the building to have our breakfasts. Only to be told off by another one of the committee member to leave the building. Reason was "It's the policy." When asked where we should go when nothing's opened, she said "You should wait in front of the SC supposedly." "Well it's not opened yet." "Yea, most of the committees are still asleep." Is that a legit reason? But anyway, we left and walked slowly back to SC just in time. Whilst enjoying the nice autumn scenery. Nasib baik kan? Haha. Enough with the rants.

Hugging Farah for some warmth!

Budget concentrate tengok jejaka2 main for finals.

After watching our netball team!

So the usual goes by like any other year. Pergi makan-makan, jalan-jalan, tengok a few games, meet up with Farah, and loads of juniors from KYS, gila berlambak rasa macam tua je. Come to think of it, should've asked around for people from Plymouth kut-kut la ada. Since kononnya I'm gonna work there next year after I graduate. Tapi owh well, dah over. Anyway, the weather was AWESOME! The sun was out, it was cool yet you could still feel the heat. Should've brought my sunnies, damn it. (They said it rained in Glasgow that day. Lebat! Nasib baik aku turun Notts!)

The night was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO cold! We watched our netball team doing their thang, and then watched finals for football while shivering our brains out. By half 7 at night we were in the bus, starting our journey back home to Glasgow. Slept through the trip back home much easier compared to the trip down to Notts. And we arrived at 2-ish in the morning? I think? Yea.

Hall was too full we literally sat on the floor, Msian style!

Cold is kickin' in!

It was a good trip, definitely. Tired out of my wits feel like all my limbs are gonna fall off due to the cold, but it could be worse right? I remember it was that cold even during the day the first time I went to Notts Games. Crazy. I had fun, met old friends and school mates, random people I haven't met for years, too. Tapi tak kenal orang-orang baru like last time. Dang. Most of them are younger than me, rasa tua. Hahahahaha.

I feel like sleeping and sleep and just sleep and continue sleeping because I'm still mentally and physically tired! :)

You Lost Me

2010-10-27T16:34:00.001+01:00

credit: yayforcbs@youtube

You Lost Me by Christina Aguilera.

So beautiful. Sooooo soulful. Ain't it? :)

Year End

2010-10-21T15:34:00.002+01:00

London

Manchester

Dusseldorf

EuroDisneyland

I wish! haha.

What If

2010-10-20T18:28:00.002+01:00

Thinking of the what ifs, knowing it won't happen.

I did better when I didn't try, so maybe I should just stop. Right?

Time for a spice. Memories are only just excuses at this point.

For my own f*cking good, I shouldn't bottle it up. But it's been done, and now all that I'm doing is trying to not overflow it. Stupid.

Forgive me, this is the only place in the whole world that I can express myself. Other than God.

Candy Jewel

2010-10-19T00:17:00.003+01:00

Yes I'm promoting my own jewelry blog. :)

CLICK HERE

It's not much yet but more will come. Put it on your bookmark aite? And don't forget to share it!

p/s: We only do it in the UK currently, but will definitely tell when we go international! :)

Matt Cardle

2010-10-17T13:19:00.005+01:00

I want Matt Cardle to serenade me to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep! Sigh, jarang daku cair dengan celebrity. Hihihi fangirl mode sikit.

SIKIT JE.

Credit: TheXFactorUK

He will be great later on! I know it! It's only 2nd week and he's already great. He'll grow, I tell you! :))))

아파

2010-10-02T18:20:00.002+01:00

I'm actually back in Glasgow already. It's been a week.

'I am a Girl' talking:

Harini first day period and my calendar is wrong. Stupid app. Pinggang sakit nak mati. What's worse that could happen? Owh. Of course. Having all my songs deleted from my iPod. My iPod IS COMPLETELY SONG-LESS now apart from those that I bought which I might say is not more than 10 at all. Lessons, lessons. OMG TOLONG LAH DEPRESSED NAK MATI!!!!!!!!! And everytime I see Asda's adverts on their yummy donuts and all, I get sad. TOLONGGGGG. I feel so stupid. T.T And tomorrow's Sunday already! WTF. And and my classes takdala sebanyak last year but but but. Urghhhhhhhh.

END.

Honest confession:

Harini 'borak' with Teddy and realised betapa sedihnya daku kerana tak dapat jumpa as promised. Before I left pun takda bunyi (not that I expected it) tapi rasa-rasanya macam sebelum tu ada cakap something as if nak contact? Or I'm plain daft? Anyway, saya sekarang seorang perempuan cepat terasa especially with old friends. Ok please slap me in the butt, thank you very much. Ever since you know what happened la kan, I'm a bit more sensitive, rasa macam, rasa macam, it's indescribable. Only God knows. But as usual aku ni suka berlakon as if I'm okay. Tapi memang I'm okay pun so whatever lah.

END.

Let's end this post for good. I'm sad and depressed and disappointed over my iPod. Stupid.

On a cheerful note, have you guys watched this? It's been awhile dah pun actually, but suddenly felt like sharing this. I like! Imagine me saying 'stupid' at 0:59 like that. HAHA suka ok. Suka. Enjoy!

Hardy-har-har

2010-09-14T16:39:00.003+01:00

Stress is beginning to build up on me. Friends are rejecting invitations. Not blaming them but I'm stressed up because I won't know when will be the next time I'll meet them. Obviously my final week here will be untouchable. All is about family next week. Well, will try to.

I can't get anything done around here. Everything's just so hard. No one to mengadu to except this place here where I can't even write what I want. Ish tu pun cannot.

Very disappointing. Balik Glasgow je lah, I'll be happier will I? No, it's different. But here is very disappointing. Not them, but myself inclusive. The peer pressure feels like I'm left out due to a particular reasoning. Owh well.

Can't believe I only have 10 days left. For the first time, I feel like I can't wait to go back.

All Round

2010-09-13T17:16:00.003+01:00

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!! :))

My 22nd birthday was on Raya Eve. So obviously there was no having a meal out or celebrating with friends like previous years. Instead, I spent my precious 22nd with my family, getting ready for Raya! Tiring like hell, almost passed out (again) but it was different for once, and nice too!

This raya seemed and felt a little bit different. Felt better, like we moved on to a new routine and got used to it already. Extra emotional, actually for the first time, during maaf session. Don't know why, I just broke down when I held my Dad's hands. Probably just a huge amount of gratefulness that I got to celebrate raya together, and thankful for all of my parent's sacrifices for me.

Now I just need to make time to fit everyone in the calendar. Sigh.

Not used to opening up to anyone. I wonder what God's plans are for me.

p/s: Have I mentioned I'll be in Plymouth July/Aug 2011?? :)) Have a good remaining raya!

Not

2010-09-06T16:33:00.003+01:00

I know most girls chop their hair as a sign of a change. For the better or to start anew. To be honest that's how I felt. Chop off all the bad 'omens' I've collected for the past year.

BUT.

That doesn't show I'm DEPRESSED! I am nothing but depressed, my friends. Tell me which summer break do I NOT cut my hair. I don't understand, seriously. Stop assuming I'm miserable, depressed, crying my eyes out. STTTTOOOPPPPPPP! I'm a big girl now, I know what to do. Ok? Sorry I'm not what you think I am. Psh..

In the mean time, do you like my new hair?? :)

Glad

2010-09-05T17:21:00.003+01:00

Alhamdulillah, I am so glad and thankful that I am blessed with such good friends.

Today had iftar with them and finally got to catch up with some of them, not all of us could come and join. And now that I'm home, I just can't appreciate enough on how lucky I am to get great old friends. 10 years and counting, guys.

I had good laughs like the usual. Not to say that I never had a hearty laugh in Glasgow. But you know what I mean, it's different with old buddies. You get to catch up, joke around, reminisce, laugh as ugly as you like. :D I just feel so relieved, like all the weight from my shoulders have lifted, like I've forgotten all the problems I have (as if I do).

Thank you. Wishing everyone else could be with us.

Shorty!

2010-09-04T17:07:00.001+01:00

I now have SHORT HAIR!! :))) I have never been happier in having short hair I have no idea why. It's shorter than any short hair you've seen me in.

I won't upload any pictures, cause no one except my family have seen it. He he he he heeeeee, suspense la konon. :) but it looks ok. I'm happy!

I've joined my sister in our jewelry-making venture. Having someone to do them with is better than making them alone. Although I am definitely a bit rusty, hehe.

Tomorrow buka puasa with some friends, finally get to meet them. I feel a bit different about it somehow. Owh well, it's just me thinking too much as usual and being sensitive where I shouldn't. Can't wait! Don't know what to have for iftar though. Fast food? Good food? Fast and good food? Good but slow food? Hmmmm..

Persoalan

2010-08-31T19:19:00.001+01:00

Kenapa tak nak update blog?

PEMALAS

Home

2010-08-16T13:03:00.003+01:00

Firstly, Happy Fasting to all my Muslim readers! Salam Ramadhan, may this Ramadhan be better than our previous Ramadhan.

I have finished work and currently quite missing the place. Always keep telling people stories of work and lone-vacation. :)

Now I am occupied with moving to my new flat. The flat is wonderful and I absolutely love it! It's unfurnished, so I had a few trips trying to find furnitures and other home stuff for the flat. I will be staying with my sister. I'm still staying at my old flat because I haven't found myself a bed yet! Grrrr. And all my belongings are still in my old room, and finding a suitable date to move them. SO BLOODY EXCITED!

I'm going back home to Kajang next Thursday. I can't believe it. I'm not prepared at all! My stuff are all over the place! I'll be going back for exactly a month. And I just realised I'll be back here on a Sunday afternoon and class starts the next day. Bijak Izati ni, bijak.

Not mentally and emotionally prepared at all to face everyone. But seriously people, don't take me seriously when I say I'm not fine. That was just during that mili-second and the next I am absolutely fine!! Pfft. So don't be saying here and there that I am miserable cause if you're here in Glasgow, the only thing that is miserable is the not-so-summer weather. I am far from miserable, put that in your head. Believe me. Geram betul aku, bukannya you even talk to me ke apa pun to know how I feel ke apa ke. Senang-senang buat kesimpulan. I'm just losing weight sebab puasa, tu jeeeerrrrr. Jangan over-analyze please?

Ok, I'm at the miserable (haha) library here during my summer break, now THAT'S miserable. And I have to head home now to charge me phone and call me parents and then head back out to town to sort me bank details and all that jazz. TOODLES!

Delay

2010-08-06T23:28:00.000+01:00

The pain has come.

It's a delayed reaction.

Gain and Lost

2010-08-04T20:24:00.000+01:00

So many things to say yet so little time (actually just plainly no time to write). This week is the last week I'm working and I haven't been put to a place for my preregistration training yet after I graduate. I'll have to harass them. :)

Friends in Glasgow are harassing agents to find me a suitable flat. I'm hoping everything will go well. Did I mention, I'LL BE STAYING WITH MY SISTER NEXT YEAR! Don't have to mention my current agent. What cheeky bastards they are, it's just disgusting.

Blogspot is still being funny.

I'm going back to Glasgow next Tuesday night. And then after that Tuesday, it'll be just over two weeks till I go back home. Home sweet home. Mentally unprepared!!

Currently I'm missing a particular friend right now, terasa drifted apart. I think I can guess why but I hope that's not the reason. Sad, really sad. Not gonna talk about it, feel so childish. People do get drifted apart, so I'll just have to accept that.

I don't know how to pack up all my stuff. I don't think they're all under 20kg. EFF!

Ending

2010-07-28T22:43:00.002+01:00

Just a little over ten days and I'll be leaving the place with nice weather, fun people and peacefulness. Time passes by quickly, doesn't it?

I just got back from a four-day holiday trip to Ilfracombe in North Devon, alone. Don't tell me that's sad, cause its not! :) I've always wanted to try travelling alone, feeling selfish and breathing fresh air, experiencing what's 'local'.

Walked along the beautiful coast, enjoyed the harbour, took a cruise trip to see the seals and relaxed at the long stretch of beach in Woolacombe, enjoying the sounds of huge waves with a cone of softee with a '99'. Bliss. Worth it. Didn't even cost me a fortune, I must add.

And as my original plans of taking advantage of the time that I am here to explore nice places, I've done them, alright. But I realise there's just too many good places to go to!! However, I'm grateful. If God forbids, I'll be seeing lots of them more often if I ever get to work here, insyaAllah.

Not gonna spoil the read by writing down my 'experiences' at work but I must say that I'm lucky I've met wonderful colleagues (and customers too). I will miss them dearly, that's for sure.

To look forward..

2010-07-20T19:04:00.002+01:00

Still hasn't sunk in. The fact that this placement that I'm doing is a form of evaluation of them offering me a job. A JOB, after I graduate. I'm grateful and glad I've been recommended, however I still haven't completely grasped the fact that if I could be and do a good job later on. Scary isn't it. I haven't even thought of it.

Whatever it is, what's confirmed is that IF I do get a job, it won't be in Scotland. I'll be here in England. I've said to my tutor I'm not someone that is limited, I go with the flow and I don't mind to be placed anywhere but in my honest opinion, no matter how much I'm loving this peaceful place, I don't think I can live here alone. To go through all this alone. Nope. No I can't.

Let's just scrap that for a moment then.

I'm gonna have a five-day break starting this Saturday. I've been roughly planning in my head where to go. I wanna go to nice beaches, small towns by the cliff, praying the weather would be nice, stay in B&B's, just relax and breath in the fresh air. Hoping all will go to plan. My horoscope said "A short holiday trip will change your life and be a memorable one." Not that I believe horoscopes tapi bestnya! Now I'm even MORE looking forward to it. :)) But seperti biasa, bak kata Mummy, "Jangan berangan, nanti sure takkan jadi." Ok Mum.

I'm just extremely itching to go shopping though!! I don't have any time at all to go! I work out of town and I travel during weekends, how am I supposed to go shopping! And it's summer sale now!!! URRRRRGGGGHHHHH.

It feels weird now. The feeling of being alone. Not loner kind of alone. I have LOADS of good company and I love them to bits. The fact that I don't get close to people easily to tell them of my life, my secrets; that feels weird, not being to share things. Friends I'm close with would know I don't even share that many things about myself with my family. We just don't really tell like personal things to each other. Unless it's good gossip and good sales! :DD But yea, it just suddenly got to me. Hehe, funny.

Here's for another good lone-getaway!

This has been stuck for a couple of days now.

Back!

2010-07-09T18:32:00.000+01:00

Can't wait to be back in Glasgow for the weekend! Miss everyone so muchhh.

p/s: Why is blogspot being weird? I can't put pictures and stuff, got none of that toolbar thingy. Hmm?

Run

2010-07-04T16:05:00.000+01:00

I went to Bristol to meet EG before he goes back to Malaysia after he graduates, (as if I won't meet him in KL la kan)

Bristol was great, kinda reminds me of Edinburgh, the weather was great. We had lunch and I got to meet new friends.

Details aside, my last train to Taunton was at 10.15pm and we had exactly 15 minutes to go there. It was great fun indeed, running with everyone and fighting with the traffic lights. At that moment, I finally felt care-free. :)

Embrace

2010-07-01T22:43:00.002+01:00

It's coming

And I'm not ready

Let's just embrace it

Pass

2010-06-30T23:06:00.002+01:00

Have I mentioned in this blog that I passed my 3rd year as a pharmacy student and I can go to my MPharm 4th year? No?

Well..

I PASSED MY 3RD YEAR PHARMACY AND I CAN CONTINUE ON TO MY MPHARM 4TH YEAR!!

I have no idea how I've forgotten to post this great great news here. I mean the moment I saw my results, I took out my phone and got to the calculator app and straight away counted my average and I PASSED!! I literally cried of gratefulness, terus sujud syukur!!

Anyway, let's all pray for a good and a much better final year for me, aye? :))

Do it

2010-06-27T00:05:00.003+01:00

The only downside of travelling alone is you think. You're not suppose to think when you're travelling!

Its as if you hold your head and knock it on the pavement.

And I realise I've been brushing them off, setting them aside, just couldn't let myself turn to face them.

I'm doing it well. My logic is doing well.

Weekend Walk

2010-06-24T20:58:00.002+01:00

It's already the end of my second week here in Taunton. Time flies by very quickly, aye?

I've been wondering what to do on weekends on my own. Member takda, semua orang tua-tua. That girl hasn't contacted me ever since and so I felt like I didn't wanna bother her. And so I'm on my own!! It's kind of a good but a bad thing as well.

So for this weekend my tutor has been telling me to go on the 'Tarka Line', somewhere through/from Barnstaple. But that's a bit of a far stretch for me to go alone on my second week. (Hinting maybe later on I will do it. ;p)

Through the power of Google, I searched and searched of a few other possible things I could travel to. There was Sidmouth, Exeter, Beer, Pecorama, Dartmoor and so many other places recommended by people. If you try searching for their images, then yeah, those are the kind of places that I WANT to visit! I want to be blown away by beautiful sceneries, beaches, coast lines. Just blow me away, Devon!!

There was an interesting idea that was reviewed and I feel like I'm up to the challenge. "A 5-miles walk from Branscombe to Beer through the coast line and back inland." Not that big of 'challenge', I mean I walk about a mile to school every single day in Glasgow, so 5 miles would be ok, right? Right? The bonus is the scenic view! I can't wait. I want to do it. I'll bring a book, lunch box, definitely sunblock. :)

We'll see how it goes. Very excited! But as Mum always say, "Jangan berangan, nanti tak jadi." So OK Mum, I won't berangan. Instead I'll plan! :D So very early on Saturday morning I will go to the train station, and ask what's the best way to go to Beer. Yes, that I will do. And we will see what will wait for me. I will embrace it happily, insyaAllah.

Btw, did I mention my tutor boasted about me to the pharmacist that I was originally supposed to work with? :) I hope I could do a good job towards my remaining 6 weeks. Crossing my fingers!

Anyway, please pray for my safety in travelling which is what I've been wanting to do since I first stepped onto the grounds of UK, and please pray for me so that I could and would do good for my placement here. THANK YOU LOVES!

Happy Father's Day!

2010-06-20T18:53:00.003+01:00

When I was much younger in my pre-school days, I would call Daddy as "D" while he would call me as "B" and I allowed NO ONE ELSE to call me by that. Except my dearest Daddy. :)

Such a calm and collected dad, so many achievements that are so inspiring, yet so down to earth that even WE don't know them. All we know is that when he reaches home, he will of course do work but he will never mention them. As I would meet his students occasionally, they would tell me of some of his works etc. and they were surprised I didn't know anything about it! Hahaha.

Dad is in the "quiet group" of the family, as Azrina and I call them. They would sit together and as if talk with their minds while the other extreme group is the "laugh as loud as you can" group. That's where I come from, of course. HAHA!

I was watching Michael McIntyre's show last night and he was talking about how dads give cool and "out of your mind" advices and that's because they lie! Hahaha. But we would always believe them! Obviously, Mum would always, ALWAYS be the main victim and all of us would laugh on it hard!

Do you find it weird that whenever mothers say anything, we tend to justify it first, not to mention quarrel. But when fathers told us to do anything, we would do it STRAIGHT AWAY, no hesitations whatsoever. It feels like a law! :))

He is a man I look up to. The love he has for his wife and family is just unmeasurable. My sister and I would always giggle and joke around on how Mum and Dad would ALWAYS wear matching clothes whenever they go out. And we, would have the pleasure of having the headache in choosing them.

*won't mention anything about his beloved car, always under its own blanket during the night or it will 'catch a cold'. :)*

Anyway, I love you, Dad. You are my inspiration and my strength, my idol. May you be protected by The Almighty, given good health and cherished with all His love, now and forever towards Jannah.

The other side

2010-06-16T22:13:00.002+01:00

I'm getting used to talking in English accent now, and not Scottish. Haha

I've only been here for 5 days and I should say it feels like a breath of fresh air. Actually, it's one of those typical places and neighborhood you would ever imagine, but actually living in one and knowing them is another feeling. Also getting to know people who lives in one of those nice villages with big big farms, just like in the movies. The weather has been nice too. It's the first day of summer here, officially. And there was not a single cloud today! Didn't help that our air-conditioning doesn't work. Roastedddddddd.

The landlady I'm living with, Lesley, is such a dear. Although it's only the 3rd day of work she's constantly asking if the place is ok, whether the travel was good etc. Yes, I'm not really working in the centre of Taunton now. Instead I was transferred to a place called Norton Fitzwarren. As they say, just at the outskirts of Taunton. I was lucky enough to know a kind colleague, Ellie that could give me a ride. A soft-spoken yet tough girl, she is. "I'm a farm girl and I ride my small car like a four-by-four~! :))" Hehe. (yes, she does)

Anyway, the first few days has been quite the same thing as my intern at the hospital last summer. I was telling myself how last summer is really helping me in this as I pick things up very quickly. But just at the dispensary. Once I meet a customer, I forget all the things I've learnt how to do in classes. I regret being a little bit unconfident when Lindsay, my tutor, suggested that I should handle a customer on my own. Wonder what she'll think of that, then, when I should've been excited to do it. What a waste of PP3, huh? Ironically, Lindsay studied in Glasgow!

I've met quite a lot of Malaysians during our Welcome Day on Monday. In fact there were five of us, out of 12. One of them is working in Taunton itself while the others are spread across West Somerset. Shanice, the one working in Taunton had the same idea of doing summer intern here: Weekend Vacay!! WOOHOOO! We quickly exchanged numbers and hope that work won't get us busy. Everyone keeps saying that 8 weeks will just fly by. Hmmm.

I'm only eating fish, vege and fruits now (plus the norm breakfast) since I have yet to venture around looking for a halal meat butcher. Hopefully there is cause I don't really know how to cook fish that well!! Plus I have to bring my own lunch, because there's literally nothing there. The store is right in the middle of the road with new housing areas at the opposite side and so far I didn't see any shops that I could go to to mingle about.

And it's the same as last summer during work as well, I sleep a lot earlier. It's only half 10 here but I'm already getting sleepy.

You told me so

2010-06-10T19:40:00.002+01:00

I'm leaving..

To Taunton this Saturday!!!!!

lkjdoifa;wekmfoiajerotijse;fokgmaierjoiarj-gaiwerkawlk!!

My luggage is 19.7kg!!!!!! URGHHHHH and so I tell myself, it's okay, just bring those important clothes, and you can buy SOME MORE in Taunton. :)))))))))))))))))))))

What's making my luggage near its limit when its only half full? I brought all my jewelry stuff. Ehehehe. Hopefully I'll be bored in that small town and will be inspired to do my jewelry. If not then I'm gonna be mad at myself for bringing that whole lot!!

Anyway, my room is almost empty. Except for some pictures on the wall and stuff that I still need to use, and some books. I've also packed some story books for me to read there. BAH, we'll see how it goes. I bet you I'll be stuck in front of my laptop ALL THE TIME.

I'm so scared on what is prepared for me in Taunton.

Side note: I'm so sick of my long hair. Can't wait to cut it short when I get back home!

Owh speaking of home, I've been looking at tickets to go back home, their prices are ok but the thing is I still can't see how I'm gonna manage my time and stuff so I still have not made my decision. I know I should be quick or the price will go shooting up!

Can't wait to meet the cat that will be teman-ing me during my summer-away! Hari-hari I will gomol-gomol him, I don't care!! :)

Btw now you can say, "I told you so!" :)

Will be posting from Taunton next!

Urge to Splurge

2010-06-01T00:44:00.002+01:00

On my recent trip to the city centre, the aim was to do some grocery shopping for the recent birthday bash's dessert, and to look for casual slacks/trousers for work during the summer later. Plus also a good pair of shoes.

However obviously being a girl that hasn't splurged since.. since.. hmmm, since way before exams maybe? Not sure. NOT including internet shopping of course. *grin* That's more for my jewelry stuff instead for myself. Anyhooooooo. I think maybe only 1 in 10 females stick to their shopping list, if they even have one.

So instead of

Groceries

A pair of trousers

A pair of shoes

I got

Two pairs of trousers. It's a hard catch for someone like me to find a good pair of trousers that fit PERFECTLY! Proudly from River Island. Belts inclusive. Also provided I don't gain back my weight. My bontot is now normal and can now wear a size 6. It won't last, believe me.

A top from Miss Selfridge. They were having a sale. It was for £5. I needed a happy, joyful-looking top to match the season. Alasan, yes.

Three tops from Zara. Again, sale. Also since there's only one Zara in the city centre and it happens to be the furthest shop from my flat, my trip HAS GOT to be worth it.

A Radley purse. I know you must be thinking, "WHERE THE HELL DID THIS COME FROM?!" I have no idea. Fraser's was only across from Zara. It was raining so I just ran through the door to go to the Men's area to look for stuff. They were having a two day sale on the handbag area. THE PURSE WAS SO CUTE I JUST HAD TO HAVE IT! Owh, I didn't even go up to the Men's area. :)) Owh not forgetting a Ted Baker credit card purse? Ehehe. It was for £5!!! Who wouldn't get that?! If I'm not gonna use it I can sell it, right. Plus, I use my cards more often then I need to carry cash. In case you're wondering, no I don't have credit cards. HAHAH IT'S NOT POINTLESS! :D

No pairs of shoes. The one I liked from Aldo was GONE!! At least I looked for it right. And then I got tired.

Groceries. Gladly!! Did I mention I almost cried because I couldn't choose which biscuits to get. Thank God for big sunnies. Must be the hormones, and the holiday stress (there's such thing right?) and the whole shopping spree around town alone. :) But as usual, dessert turned out to be awesommeeee. FYI, I chose Oreo's over Mandy's, I think?

On a side note, I watched Sex and The City 2 that night and boy was I underdressed!!! WTH its just a movie, you don't have to wear a cocktail dress! T.T Also if you haven't watched the movie, better not unless you're a real real real real die hard fan. I prefer the first one. More laughs and eye-bulging, double takes, mouth gaping scenarios. The second one is more of a realistic thing I guess, like a lesson. BOOOOORIIIINGG. Hehe!

Going to Centre Parcs this weekend. Much needed de-stressor!

Pack up

2010-05-27T23:03:00.003+01:00

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighhh. That's what I've been doing the whole day today, sighing. Not healthy, ladies, not healthy.

On Tuesday I made a day trip down to Taunton. Took a flight to Bristol in the morning. ALMOST COULDN'T MAKE IT! OMG, I was swearing the bus driver every few minutes and was telling myself, "Shit shit shit shit I'm not gonna make it." Imagine, it says that the gate closes at 8.25am on the boarding pass and the bus arrived on - yes my friends, 8.25am. Well it's probably my fault at first because I woke up late, ignored my first alarm and when I got to the bus station the bus was already reversing. T.T

And no, it wasn't at it's stop yet. THERE WAS A LONG LONG QUEUE TO GET INTO THE AIRPORT AND EVEN THE CAB DRIVER IN THE QUEUE WAS READING A NEWSPAPER!!! So I just had to tell the driver that I have to get off NOW and HERE and I ran my heart and legs out and my God, it felt like forever to reach the gate! Thank God for good pair of shoes. Thank God for online check-in. :) Anyway, I made my way through the securities, and even the man said, "Run, girl!". Hahaha budus. The gate was far as well so another marathon for me. And I was right on time. :) *Smug* People were queueing up to get onto the plane.

Since it was a morning flight, I think I was the only one dressed casually with my MJ on my hand and my iPod. Everyone else were probably on their business trips. Haha.

Got to Bristol airport, I realised it was warmer than Glasgow, it has that humidity. Although there was no sun and just clouds, its still a bit warmer. Very nice. Took the bus to Temple Meads train station and the same thing happened again. I was one minute late for the train to Taunton. It was quite an old looking train station and I couldn't understand the timetable and the only thing I knew for sure was that the next train was in one hour's time. URGHHHHHH.

One hour later, I was on my one hour trip to Taunton!!! The scenery was great, so spacious and comfortable! (No, I'm not talking about the train seat, hehe). Felt so jakun and foreign because I'm so used to being in a city. Hehe.

Got to Taunton and I don't know what the temperature was but it surely was HOT! Met Lesley, my landlady at her place at took a peek at the room. It's small and all but its just nice for a short stay, I mean it's not like I'll be there for a whole term right. And finally met her cat, Siam (pronounced as Sa-yem). Soooooo calm but friendly and he knows he's the big boss! Hehe then we had lunch and took a walk to the town. Lesley and I, not Siam and I, haha I wish! It was sooooooooo soooooooooo warm. After that I took a final glance of Taunton and took my train back to Bristol. I slept most of the time.

Once I reached Bristol I told myself I have 2 hours to go around. They say the large shopping centre is heavenly heaven so I was looking for it. After say about 20 minutes walk (?) I finally arrived!!!!!!!!!!!! And honestly I wasn't even close to being impressed. St Enoch's is even better. But then I realise what everyone was talking bout. It's not THAT mall, its the place next to it, called Cabot Circus if I'm not mistaken. OMG. Now THAT'S shopping heaven. It's like a pedestrian street shopping area but there are also indoor places like small malls? I don't know how to explain it and memory doesn't serve me well. Time wasn't on my side really and I kept telling myself "Shit shit shit I don't have time to shop!!!! What a pity!" But then I guess it's a good thing, I don't have a luggage to carry everything together into my flight back to Glasgow. I thought "Hmm I'll get this in Glasgow" Hahaha.

As I was starting to feel tired and exhausted from walking under the sun, I saw Starbucks around the corner near the river and was joyful imagining myself sipping a grande caramel frappucino coffee. BUT THEY RAN OUT OF IT! I was soooo, well, disappointed. But I really needed a cool drink so I settled with that raspberry ice blended tea thingy, I needed the sugar. :)

I walked towards the train station to get to the bus stop to go to the airport but it was still early. So I took a seat in a small park and I felt as if I was jet lagged from the exhaustion! Seriously, my eyes felt swollen and tired. And while sitting there, resting my blistered feet, having my cool drink with dogs running here and there, the warm sun and not-so-cool breeze had me thinking on lots of things. Suddenly I was so afraid of the future, like will I graduate on time? What's gonna happen after that, will I be a great employee at a great company? Will I be here or back in Malaysia?

And suddenly I felt lonely. I don't really have friends here like back home where I can tell just anything at all. No. Frankly and honestly speaking, it's like I have no where to turn to be it for happy or sad news. Of course I share good good memories with people here, they're like my family. I laugh the most with them. But I don't share anything with my real family either so maybe that's the same? People come and go here, maybe that's why. My social skills aren't great then, hehe. So there I was in the middle of the foreign Bristol on my own, missing my friends back home. Especially my girls.

Finally took the bus to the airport, went through the securities, and I was there on time when the flight status suddenly changed. DELAYED. Just great. Sarcasm note aside, it was kind of great. I finally got my caramel frapuccino!!!!! The Starbucks was right in front of my gate. Hehe so glad. And of course, I might as well get my dinner, right.

It was tiring, the trip. But it was nice to be able to clear my head, get my thoughts straight and acknowledge for once what I feel. Because I never really listen to myself. I don't have pictures of the trip, it feels awkward and tourist-y to be taking pictures. :) But now I'm looking forward for my short stay! I'm glad I made the decision to do my intern in Taunton. And no, population dia takda la sikit sangat! Ramai je orang!! Heheheh.

Delivery Man that doesn't deliver

2010-05-20T14:49:00.003+01:00

I'm writing this with full of anger and disappointment and everything except joy and happiness!!! YAYTK!!!!!!!!! Fuh fuh fuh sabar.

So I have been ordering things online, such as wires for my jewelries etc and have been looking forward to them. Surprisingly they dispatched it after just a few hours of ordering and that got me more excited!

On Monday I was supposed to get one of my parcels but this stupid effing postman only left a notice card saying "Sorry you were out.." bla bla bla. HELL-O!!! I WAS IN THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME AND I DIDN'T EVEN HEAR YOU BUZZ!! Excuse my french but I really am pissed!!!

Okay fine, takpa. I had the mood today to go out and pick up my stuff from the post office yang jauhnya agak jauh, and was feeling light as I was really looking forward to my parcel. I had a feeling my second parcel would arrive today because I received an email from them saying it's been dispatched, and since it's a next-day-delivery, memang patut la kan sampai today.

So I waited until noon to actually do anything, but nope, no sound from the buzzer what so ever. Maybe it's not meant to arrive today. So I took my shower, got ready (dengan mata bengkak dan gatal macam siut je kan) and went out to go to the post office. Before I got out the main door of our building, I took a peek at our postbox. And guess what. GUESS WHAT MY DEAR FRIENDS. THERE IT WAS ANOTHER NOTICE TIMED 11.20AM SAYING I WASN'T AT HOME TO RECEIVE MY MAIL. KEPALA HOTAK MAKCIK DIA LAWA!!!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!

I took both of the cards and went to post office, hari ni dah la panas gila jalan berpeluh2, and when I got there obviously I could only get the first parcel sebab the other parcel tak sampai lagi. BODOH!! That's what I said to the man, kesian dia tak bersalah. Yes I said "bodoh" to him. Mampus dia la nak paham ke tak, ternganga dia tengok. I told him "Am I suppose to come here EVERY FUCKING SINGLE DAY TO GET MY PARCEL?! DON'T PAY THE POSTMAN THEN!! I am not going to ask for a stupid redelivery system!! Useless!!"

Dah jalan keluar dah nak sampai John Lewis dah tiba-tiba nampak van Royal Mail. Probably bringing today's UNDELIVERED STUFF to the post office. MALAS AKU NAK ULANG BALIK KE SANA, sekali takda macam mana. EEE BANGANG TAU TAK BANGANG!! ALL MY WIRES ARE SUPPOSE TO GET HERE TODAY!!!! TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HARINIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!

Decided to get Frappucino to cool me down and some KFC. Sampai rumah nak makan KFC pun rasa boleh muntah balik sebab bengang sangat dengan postman ni. EEEEEEEEEEE MEH SINI TENGOK SIKIT MUKA DIA!! HANDSOME KE TAK HANDSOME KE MAMPOS KAU!! Urggggghhhhhhhh please excuse me, memang tengah bengang to the ultimate.

New Page

2010-05-16T15:15:00.003+01:00

On the right you will see the heading "Pages" and a new page has finally been created for my dear jewelries. Haha. Finally. I'll be uploading most of my handmade jewelries, those that I think are marketable and doesn't show my amateur skills AS MUCH. :') So those who want to take a look go ahead and I will be keeping the page updated as my designs are freshly made, so keep an eye out for them. Hihihi.

Owh and yes please, feel free to comment. :)

Post

2010-05-16T02:44:00.002+01:00

It's a bit late but..

I CAN USE MY LAPTOP!!

I FINISHED MY EXAMS!!

AND I GOT EXEMPTED FROM MY PRACTICAL EXAM!!

Hehehehe :)

Exam was alright. The second paper was a killer and I even dreamt I failed the paper!!!!!!!! :(((((( Then on Friday we got to know if we were exempted from that PP3 practical exam. You know how they do it, ala X Factor or American Idol gitu. They split us up in two different rooms and everyone in a particular room will get the same results.

I was with a few belas people, and suddenly the technician came in and said "Ok you're exempted!!". Just like that. We were like jumping around and shouting all over the room!! Like how you would see in X Factor!! Hahaha someone even shouted "Where's Simon Cowell??!!" It was THAT good to be able to NOT take the exam. :) I feel bad for K and Morv though. They could hear us screaming through the door. But it's okay, they can do it next week!

Masalahnya, kalau exempt ke tak exempt ke my marks tak dikira dalam my year average marks. Dapat first grade pun takda beza. Kurang hasam tak??!! Aku dah buat elok-elok so that dia boleh save markah-markah aku yang lain yang macam longkang, sekali dia kata tak dikira. Mr Bang jumpa Mrs Ang. Dia bagi credit mark je. Siut betul, aku spend beratus-ratus jam dari first half of the term and dia tak kira markah, kasi 20 credit mark je. Bongok.

Tau alasan dia sebab apa. Sebab ramai orang akan fail and so jadi tak fair sebab akan bawak turun markah diorang. SIAPA SURUH DIORANG FAIL?! No like really, fair ke tak fair. The course is for 20 credit marks, adakah anda patut fail, ANY course for that matter. I mean ye la kan, 3rd year ni semua course 20 credits, but kenapa nak discriminate practical niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii... Hello, manufacturing tu lagi ramai orang akan fail ok, so tak payah la kira yang itu jugak kalau camtu!

:''((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( Tak nampak ni tarik muka extreme!

Sedih tau sedih. Jahat!

Anyway, takpa la kut. Kita tawakkal je la.

Just got back home after makan-makan and laughed effing out loud watching Mario Mariono Bros? Or something like that? God.. Lawak nak mati cerita ni!!!!!! You could see my gut through my mouth and brain through my nose sebab gelak teruk sangat. It's like raw comedy tau. Definitely had a good laugh. Lagi-lagi exams are finished. *SMUG*

And when I got back home, bumped into Ustream live of Wonder Girls MV Premier? Haha orang habis exam, takda kerja. At least I watched a premier, whatever it is. :) Its cool, but short. Teringat Kaklong and Izura, Wonder Cuuuuurrrrlllss. Hahaha! Ok, inside joke, sorry.

I'm gonna have to start making my jewelries. Sharpen my skills. Lagipun it's not that cold now to be sprawling on the floor with my jewelry stuff. Even my jewelry-making corner in the room dah berhabuk. Mana boleh vacuum, habis la all my stones nanti. Hahah. But yea, I've got quite a number of designs from MONTHS back, sekarang baru nak buat and catalogue them and price them. Most of them takda prices lagi, macam mana orang nak beli betul tak?! Nanti I'll put the pictures up ok? Still contemplating on making a blog sale. Hmmmm. Tengok dulu bagaimana. ;)

Owh God, just remembered I have to pack up all my stuff dah. :( Yes, I'll be moving to Taunton, Somerset soon enough and will be emptying my room. Of course I won't be bringing ALL my stuff down to Taunton, gila ke apa. I'll be meeting up with the lady next Tuesday. Day trip to Taunton, hope all will be well. Masalahnya NI number ni tak dapat-dapat lagi. Padan muka, apply lambat lagi. Owh, the mak cik ada kucing!!!!!!!!!!! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG. Ok calm meow.

And I do NOT know why my parents kept on asking if she's gonna give me breakfast. Mum, Dad, I won't be staying at B&B. (=.=) Owh Dad says he can chip in sikit because currency dah turun. Hihihi but I'll save that for later. Maybe like bila nak BELI KERETA ke. Hahaha. And he offered to get a new laptop since I'm going on to my final year. Alhamdulillah. Sorry ya baby HP, you're such a nuisance now although I lap you vewy much.

It's 3 am dah. Better go to sleep. Say NO to microwaved milk. Huhu.

I'm out.

Mata Exam Ikan

2010-05-08T10:52:00.002+01:00

It's Saturday dah. :(( Which means tomorrow is Sunday. Which means the next day is Monday. Which means I'm gonna have my first paper at exactly 2.00PM!!! Yo yo 2pm! Haha so out of the picture. Anyway, yea. I'm scared out of my wits for my finals. Have no idea why. Maybe its because I need to do REALLY well to pass to 4th year. OMG 3rd year is such an anjing.

I can't believe I've successfully make trips to the library every single morning sampai ke petang. Smug. And this time tactic bertukar as I won't be rushing to get a table that I like. Instead, I'll get a computer. Haha tak ramai sangat orang guna computer pagi buta so I get to choose where and which computer to use. Smart kan? HAHAHAHA.

Okay dah. Side note: Charger laptop MASIH belum sampai.

I think I've been a bit aggressive on my eyes lately. Asyik duduk depan computer je or malam2 trying to surf the net through my small iPod touch ni or my phone. It is small la kan compared to a laptop. And so my mata now dah bengkak and red and I think something is coming out. Hehe sounds icky I know. But yea, need to get myself eye drops. I'm a good example of low patient compliance sebab if I buy the full bottle eye drop tu I'll use it once or twice and won't use it until 3 months after! Mana boleh! 'Please discard after 28 days'!! Kena cari yang one time use tu je. Owh and I've stopped wearing my contact lenses walaupun dia tulis situ 'Contains hydrogen silicone, making it a breatheable contact lens!' Whatever.

Mungkin sebelum ni I've been a bit kuno or just couldn't care. But last few months I was browsing through android punya apps ni and I've been reading reviews on what provider gives a cheap international text and almost everyone says fishtext is good. So I've been using it and I SAVED TONES! Message Msia 2 pence je. T.T Apsal tahun2 sebelum ni tak pernah tau pun. Orang duk sibuk suruh guna skype and everything. Kalau takda cukup texts in your tariffs, message UK number pun 2 pence je! I think. I don't know, just check sendiri lah. Google je. :)

Ok need to stop rambling and start with my studying. :) :( GOOD MORNING!! Nice nice sunny day.

Bank holiday

2010-05-03T10:05:00.001+01:00

Bank holiday today! Doesn't make a difference pun. Hmph

Finally there's sun (but its 0 degree C!) and hopefully plenty more this week. Last week have been terrible. :(

Going to Strathclyde park to enjoy the sun, while studying. Extremely worried of my papers this time.

Owh. That's me own Costa! ;) Also made scrambled eggs tadi and realised milk dah habis so I put whipped cream instead. XD

P/s I'm still blogging from my phone. Thank God for technology. But bought my charger from eBay dah for 10 quid. Thank God again for online shopping.

B Scare

2010-04-29T16:20:00.002+01:00

Apparently there was a bomb scare in our uni library just now!

There were police dogs. And then more police came! They came to our department as well since some of the chemicals have gone lost? I don't know. Seriously, such drama. They should postpone our exams! ;p

Anyway, now I'm in the library. No it's not blown into ashes. -.-

Everything ok now, I hope. InsyaAllah. Hehe. Back to studying!!

My laptop's charger is broken. :((((((

I'm singing "At night they would go walking till the breaking of the day. The morning is for sleeping." Guess what song.

Milk

2010-04-28T21:04:00.001+01:00

Drinking milk to put me to sleeeeep.

No I didn't drug it.

My laptop is broken just this morning. Siigh. What a day.

Sent from my HTC

Burn

2010-04-27T22:11:00.002+01:00

I have exams coming.

The End.

Spidey

2010-04-25T12:45:00.002+01:00

Spidey bit me again?

Anything

2010-04-24T13:39:00.003+01:00

I would do anything to go back home right now.

But.

Time won't allow me.

And maybe in the future, I would be glad I didn't.

Whipped Cream

2010-04-22T17:26:00.004+01:00

I've decided

Nama dia 'Cream'

DON'T ASK ME WHY

Kalau dia marah dia jadi 'Whipping cream'

Kalau dia happy dia jadi 'Double cream'

Kalau dia extremely happy jadi 'Sprinkles on top'

Kalau dia sedih dia jadi 'Whipped cream'

Kalau dia random dia jadi 'Milk'

Jalan-jalan

2010-04-16T14:52:00.003+01:00

Temperature today was 14C. So I decided to finally go to Crookston to find where the heck my hospital placement is. Relaxing walk, I had. There was a park nearby as well but I didn't take any photos. Hehe.

See, it's a clear sky. Takda pun haze so don't fret. But I bet the small "glassy" particles are everywhere. *shivers*

I'm starting to get tired easily with this warm weather.

Big fat reminder to self: Start drinking your juices!

A song is currently on repeat in my head right now. And it's quite a depressing song I might say, but it's relaxing, so what the heck.

Y'all know how I love Hyori. This one is called Want Me Back. Love the beginning, "It's. O. Ver." :) Again this has nothing to do with my current life situation, it's just me liking this song so my dear friends pls don't go psycho on me and ask what happened. I love you all! :))

credits to alexiiiaaaable

Inspiration

2010-04-15T21:56:00.003+01:00

I was reading through my blog today. On LAST EASTER'S entries. I realised I had soooo much work before last easter's break. This year, all the tests and exams are pushed to AFTER easter. Why owh why. And I did get 1st grade in my tests, tahun ni je kureng sikit.

And when I read through again, I remembered I stayed up all night doing my work. I slept 1 to 2 hours a day only starting 3 weeks before my exams started. I complained how my exams were starting early, but it's way earlier now!! How did I do that?? Stayed up all day and night, burning the midnight oil.

Then I realised I had no inspiration to do so. Last year, once it's April, I would have gotten my ticket back home dah. And I would put my count down to my "comeback" to Malaysia on all my blog posts. But not this year. Maybe that's why kurang semangat nak belajar. Mengada betul, kan?

Tapi HARUS semangat!! If I don't do well this year I may never even get my Masters! And I'll only graduate with a Bachelors degree and I won't be able to become a pharmacist and who knows what will happen to my scholarship!!

Isn't that suppose to be "inspirational" enough to push me to work harder??!!

Anyway, this morning I woke up and realised it was not 6am but 10! Sigh. Read the news about the Iceland volcanic eruption and that the haze is already covering northern part of UK and also mid Europe. All flights were immediately cancelled! I wonder if there were any of us stuck in Europe? Apparently the volcano is still erupting (well it was when I read the news). Kebetulan masa tengah baca tu it was sunny and then suddenly from outside my door (eh window lah!) came a huge big cloud. Dah mula psycho I went "Is that the 'glassy' haze??" and then I laughed. Haha bimbo betul!

All my friends were curious if there was really a haze but the weather today was so goooood! It was sunny that I had to take a walk to the LIBRARY! :'(( But it was good. Not as good as the picnic day, that was one of the warmest day of the year! Hehe.

Ok so starting from now I will will will will work hard and harder than last year. Maybe for now not as extreme because I have a lot of practical exams after the break finishes. But after that, then I can start my extreme studying. Let's go go goooo!

New Layout!

2010-04-14T23:16:00.003+01:00

I've put up a new layout! I was getting bored of the dark and dull layout and so this is my new one! :))) I don't want my blog to look as depressing as the owner. Hehe

I want to start new on certain things and this should mark as the first one. I now should start being selfish for the time being (and no one should get mad at me) because my exams are coming! Tsk. Next week I'll have the horror FMT test, a hospital visit in Paisley and a PP3 practical class test! Since I was the only one who passed in the PP3 class mock test previously, I surely pray and hope that I won't flunk this one!!!

The week after I'll have a presentation of my hospital visit (more like a drilling session!) and then a video exam of "Responding to Symptoms". Sigh. AND THEN the week after that I'll have a degree exemption PP3 practical class test. If I pass this I won't have to take the exam this May!

InsyaAllah I'll do well. Pray for the best!

Thermo!

2010-04-13T21:00:00.002+01:00

I'm wearing a heat mask! It does work! O.O

In the morning

2010-04-12T23:34:00.004+01:00

Woke up today feeling even more tired and forced myself to sleep MORE. Finally got out of bed and went straight to the toilet, had my usual morning business and brushed my teeth. Only after that I glanced in the mirror and I was shocked to see a pair of swollen eyes coupled with eye bags. T.T A tiring yet enjoying weekend, I had.

Hawa's birthday party was on Saturday. As usual, Saturday nights always end late with the never ending boraks. ;) Called Mum and of course dia bercerita pasal cucu-cucunya. Bak kata Azmil, "Sikit-sikit Adam! Sikit-sikit Ariz!". My nephews have groooown. Especially Ariz with his never ending borak. This time Mum said, during a wedding Ariz went "You know what Nena, that old lady gave me a JUNKIE LOLLIPOP!" Sabar je la pak cik kecik ni, hehe!

Went to a car boot sale in Lanark yesterday (finally stepped into Lanark after more than 2 years in Glasgow!) and the weather was soooooooooooooooooo hot! The sun was blazing down on us, literally. Tak pasal-pasal bertambah hitam, and kaki berbelang thanks to my crocs. Got a few crystals, tak nak beli banyak barang just yet because I'll be moving (again) after the term finishes. But the weather was so nice, we just had to get ourselves some ice cream!

After that we had our picnic session by the river!!! Sighh, so nice, to be able to spend the day out with good company and good warm-but-cool kind of weather.

Everyone sibuk makan. NGAP!

Ngap jangan tak ngap!

Antara pompuan-pompuan yang suka berfoya-foya.

Lepas makan, I became this gomok! T.T

After that Nizam brought us to this animal farm-ish place. Dapat walked through a very short track and saw the wide space of land with the "big kipas putih" in the background. Siap ada white deer lagi. Pastu in the "farm" jumpa a pair of black swans, new born kambing biri-biri, goat with a goatie and sheep-ish smile (how ironic, haha!), and fluffy rabbits!! Sayang je tak dapat tengok babi, kalau tak boleh lepas geram kat dia jerit-jerit "BABI!". :)

That night as usual makan-makan at Aunty's place and went home quite early. Everyone was already tired. I slept before midnight! Fuh.

Tomorrow's plan: Go to post office to post Izura's document (baru nak post esok, mintak maaf. Dah lama GILA tak pergi post office, tak gheti dah!) and jalan-jalan cari hospital in Paisley. Hope the weather will be good.

As usual, I will end my day with reading a few notes from uni and keep reminding myself to be a more patient and understanding girlfriend (and daughter jugak ;p)

Failed Therapy

2010-04-10T03:49:00.009+01:00

Failed retail therapy. Mungkin ada hikmahnya.

Today went to town (alone) since the weather was ok and I needed to buy Hawa's present for her party tomorrow. Dia dah excited and has been asking what we got her ever since. Tak sup-gh-ise la, Hawa ni. Hehe esok pergi party bawak basikal okay.

Anyway buying her present only took me 15 minutes. :) After that, had my hot chocolate break and sambung for MY stuff. I haven't gone down to Buchanan Street ever since New Year sale. Ke? Ntah, macam exaggerating gila la pulak kan. But I can't remember when was the last time I went down. Setahu I, every time I lalu Buchanan St I'll need to go to Zara and I'll surely get something. So the last thing I bought was my jacket. That was in winter as in winter before it snowed I think? Ntah la. Whatever.

Anyway, I was hoping I would get something. BUT. Tak menyusuk kalbu la. If ada pun sure size too small or too large. Jeans lawa tapi tak lepas bontot ape hal pulak kan. Khakis pulak the smallest size pun longgar apesal?! OMG. Maybe it's their sizing. Hehe. Anyway, even their trafaluc blouses didn't amuse me. So disappointed. :((((

And then after that went to Aldo to see if they have any good (yo-yo je good) handbag. Hehe. LAWA all the colours and everything. But tak menyusuk kalbu, yet again. There was this really really nice sling bag but it's a bit too small. But if I keep thinking about it that means we're meant to be kan? :) I'll go get it tomorrow. It's cheap anyway. But I want (no no. Need!) a new handbag! I don't want a sling bag! :(( Nak nangis je rasa. WTH is wrong with me, man? Nak handbag pun boleh nangis. Macam kecik sangat je nangis masa nak cotton candy.

HELLO I HAVEN'T SHOPPED FOR A LONG TIME OK. Kesian tau. Rasa kampung sikit, don't know what's the trend now. HEHE! My flatmate was telling me all the shops now have roses la apa ntah. I was like, "Owhhh really?" and when I went down today semua dah tukar dah pun! Tak payah la! So outdated dah! Hish.

Terlampau banyak social problem pulak tu. Hehe! We're dubbed as people with "social problems". Mengajak orang ke jalan sesat, kononnya. Ok la, mungkin betul la to your eyes, nampak macam sebegitu. That's fine, if you want to say so. Banyak betul jenis orang kat dunia ni. Now I'm seeing more kinds of people. Like Lady Pot Pet says, kawan ada banyak jenis. Ada kawan yang akan stand for us come what may, ada kawan yang nak play safe lepas tengkuk sendiri, ada kawan yang on the surface jer, ada kawan yang boleh jadi lawan. And I get what she means. I had the same feeling as she did on this one person. Snap twist la us both, Aunty.

Quoting another friend again, Njay my Shorty kata if jumpa orang pelik, kita buat bodoh macam diorang je. ;p

Siiiighhh. My crave for BK dah kurang. I want a handbag. :(

Hmph

2010-04-09T15:44:00.001+01:00

Are u in a coma or something?

Did u fall n got your head knocked on the pavement?

What's wrong with all u people?

Geli bulu ketiak je pikir. Hish.

Jealousy

2010-04-07T19:21:00.004+01:00

It's good that some people realise that they have gone through the path of jealousy. They turn and walk back and apologize. And if they do look back to where they've walked, it won't be a pretty sight. I may not be (actually am not) in the best position to actually address this, but we learn as we grow and we make the rules as we go.

C'mon la, a girl like me, at this age especially, has felt jealousy to the extreme. Bila lagi nak rasa jealous. Bila dah tua-tua, tiba-tiba nak rasa jealous sure rasa macam so childish and so not right. Right? Because of jealousy lah my life almost went haywire. You will fail to think straight and judge rightfully. Sure fail jadi judge kat court! Teeheehee. Especially kalau rasa jealous towards someone you don't even know of.

But feeling jealous of someone you know, tak kisah la whether you share the same straw or drink from the same well ke tak, sure lagi la embarrassing. Kesimpulannya that trait never benefits a person. Unless its the healthy kind of jealousy?

I'm just gonna try and tell this story straight. How true it is I can't really tell. But this is so that all of us can judge together and be it a lesson for us to open our eyes wider. Terpaksa la tulis dalam bahasa sendiri sebab kalau orang asing baca boleh buat bikin malu, walaupun sekarang ada google translate. Hehe!

I have a second family here in Glasgow and am a really grateful girl. Without them here I think I'd rather study (or suffer) in U*M. :) Tapi Glasgow ni pelik sikit. Tak tau la tempat lain pun ada wujud sebegini jugak. I'm speaking from my own judgement, not influence. Sifat dengki and jealous tu memang banyak betul. As you all know (or don't), I've been volunteering promoting our Malaysian colourful culture to the locals and it's a lot of fun! My parents have been sending me to outside school activities since young and I've been enjoying them so this really is a bonus considering I'm on my own here without my parents! Fuh. It started off small but now slowly even ministers know us! Great right! Click HERE for our latest event!

Anyway, terbabas pulak ceritanya. As if it's a rule of life, behind every success is not just a woman but also jealousy. Apa yang peliknya, seperti yang terdengar2 dari kawan kepada saksi, ada certain community M kat sini has been spreading news of anti-Uncle and anti-Aunty and anti-MYSSACK i.e. this family that I've been mentioning above. Actually before this I've heard of something like "Jauhkan diri from your seniors yang tak betul tu". Daku dan kawan-kawan daku la tu ya? Kenapa nak anti? Lagi ironic is this news was spread masa sesi ilmiah. Setahunya, walaupun takda la terer mana tapi pernah jugak banyak kali pergi and helped host this kind of pertemuan and for all I know never ever a name of a known person/colleague/whatever-you-call it is mentioned. Are we preaching some kind of another religion to actually be avoided? Plan nak tulis dalam bahasa sendiri pun tak boleh sebab tension sangat, hehe.

And so you left a bad impression on these "clean sheets" who doesn't know anything kononnya with a good nawaitu. Of? Of a bad religion example? If we are doing anything that's HARAM then why not be a good preacher and tegur elok-elok. Bukan amanah kepada negara and pemimpin ada dalam text book agama masa sekolah dulu jugak ke? That's an honest question, bukan nak imply apa-apa.

That's them to judge, you can't tell them what to do. Like I said in my FB, dear mahasiswa/i yang pandai2 belaka dapat belajar jauh2 and sambung belajar, I'm a Muslim and I'm not a terrorist, you are a Muslim too and you're not a terrorist too right? Lagi2 we're from the same country. So even when you bump into me you can say hi and shout my name from afar too if you like! Because actually right now you're not doing that just because I'm "not as good as you are"? Well, it never really gave me a MAJOR impact on me. Psh, as if I care kan. But it does happen to LOTS of people who DECIDED THEMSELVES to NOT JOIN YOUR WAY OF EDUCATING PEOPLE because they can judge themselves on what is WRONG AND RIGHT. Sebab you think your level of ilmu agama lebih tinggi you "looked down" and mengaibkan other people who are not in your same page. And even make a "discussion" out of it together with your friends tu. What does that make you? What. Does. That. Make. You.

Now I see that jealousy does make you ugly. It does. After seeing all this I realise nothing good EVER comes out of jealousy. It only reflects your immature level of thinking (bahasa kampung: cetek betul pemikiran kamu! Tengah imagine dalam drama, mak mentua cakap macam tu kat the lead actress, huahuahua) and your weaknesses. The public will see you in two different angles. You're either supported as they're blinded the same way you are, or you're pitied, by how low your knowledge seemed to be despite how high you put your noses up and of your inferiorities.

This is also a lesson for me and us all. Jangan buat macam ni nanti Allah balas balik.

You think I cannot gossip ;p

2010-04-06T01:00:00.003+01:00

WARNING

To be read in a very high sarcastic tone, with exaggeration all over your face and your hands flying every where:

I feel like I have no rights to say this. Maybe it's because I'm still young and still don't understand what makes the world goes around. Or maybe it's because I have a mind that's too broad? Haha. I even try my hardest (read as waste my time) putting myself in their shoes and try to think like them but I just can't. They must have really incredible IQ numbers!

Ok in general my dear readers, imagine this. Nowadays, banyak wedding invitations ikut tag FB je, senang kan. If you're invited then you're tagged. Obviously out of courtesy, RSVP kena la bagi ye tak? FB pulak very the public oneeeee. Your wonderful wedding invitation might attract many pairs of eyes. Ada secubit nak tengok je, ada secubit pulak nak rasa happy "eh makcik muka mcm ni pun dah nak kahwin dah", ada pulak secubit tak malu tag diri sendiri. Huahuahuahua. Secubit yang last ni lah are very interesting and complicated people. You'll never EVER guess what's in their minds.

Dahlah invite diri sendiri, tak kenal siapa-siapa. You wear your expensive clothes, put on your shiny shoes, and with that expression on your face you basically crashed the person's supposedly wonderful day. They don't know who you are yet you expect them to treat you like you're the King. WTH seriously. How low can you go? Bak kata my friend, macam orang masuk rumah orang lain, masuk dapur habiskan makanan, pastu keluar marah-marah. Hmmmmm sounds like a burglar yang tak puas hati, no? Hehehe.

That's one point. What happens if you're caught red-handed? OMG, mana la nak taruk that pretty face of yours, kan? Dah pakai lawa-lawa pulak tu. OhMyGDragon betul. Eeeee if that was me, hihi, malu betul! I wish the Earth would swallow me there and then!! HAHA aaaahhh I get embarrassed and giggly just thinking about it. But as usual, some people are just 'unique'. Secubit dari secubit seperti mentioned above (YAYTK Manglish pun boleh berterabur!! HAHA), muka tebal satu batu. Makeup tebal, tak kut. Hehe. Mungkin tak pakai cleanser yang sepatutnya?

The most important point, after dah crash someone else's party, take their delicious food, CAUGHT RED-HANDED (HAHA), you go back and you get all pissed off and you make a public statement dissing the host that doesn't even KNOW you in the first place. Be grateful you're IN the marvelous place itself! Seriously, WHERE IS THIS PERSON'S BRAIN AND WHAT SIZE IS IT??? Kelakar ok. I can't even put my finger on what the hellllll is he thinking. Memang sangat complex this creature.

So I've been figuring out and trying to increase my amp of thinking (or decrease maybe?) but I still don't get it. Tolonglah, someone should get an award for finding out this interesting subject.

First, I can't imagine wasting my time getting ready for an event that I don't even know what for and who are the people who would be there.

Two, I can't imagine actually stepping into the place and eating their food like nobody's business unless I'm from the movie "Wedding Crasher" (that's a good movie btw).

Third, I can't imagine how effing red my face and in fact my whole body would be after I've been found out, kantoi di situ gitu.

Fourth, why the hell and how would/could I get pissed from all of the above when I should feel embarrassed and out of place? Especially when I have no clue what so ever?

I don't blame you for not getting what I'm trying to say because basically, memang it doesn't make sense!! Like I said, all our IQs doesn't match this subject!!! Tapi to some, it does and it's very crucial in their lives, haha.

Ok on a serious note, personally, I don't mind this 'unique' person not understanding what our event is for because he can easily join the 'unique' pool. Unfortunately he won't stay unique if he stays in the pool, bahahahah. Ok terpesong, keluar sekarang! Anyway, a misunderstanding is one of the ways of life. The way you unravel it is how wise and responsible you are. And especially RESPECT. Be a wise netizen and don't go shouting the F word without a solid ground to a person much much wiser and most probably more knowledgeable than you are! Buat bikin malu je. Like my friend googled, what does "cakap tak serupa bikin" mean in English? It means "talking in colours" :D So stop talking in colours (or in your case, spitting) and start talking some sense! Boleh? BOLEH CIKGU! hahaha

Side note: NAK MUSHROOM SWISS BURGER FROM BK!!!! Nasib baik bukannya mengidam kalau tak memang lucky betul future laki ku.

Swing

2010-04-03T01:19:00.003+01:00

Here is Lee Hyori's new song, Swing. Love it. I just love her. And this is just fresh.

Love it!. Has got nothing to do with me personally, cause I'm good and all that ok. Hehe!

So they say the clown resembles a fun but scary ex-lover or something like that. And she's all wearing black cause she's emotionally 'killed' by the clown. The luggage the clown brings resembles her? And she purposely 'haunts' him with all these memories she brings along with her. Something like REVENGE! TASTE YOUR OWN MEDICINE like that! Huahuahua. Ok I'm officially crazy. But yea, Hyori's the best. :))

Edit: Ok so I don't think the video is coming out right in my blog as I can't seem to fit it! That's the smallest, I swear! Go watch it yourself in YT ok? :)

credits to owners, subbers, uploaders etc.

Tak Suka!

2010-03-30T16:05:00.003+01:00

So, I have been so emotional lately. Thanks to Miss Hormone, of course. No actually, I'm full of emotional distress! ABUNDANT! I need to go to an anger management course.

Last Friday was no joke. Fridays are no joke to me. I hate them, (just this semester because I'm not supposed to literally HATE Fridays) because I always have 9 to 5 and just one hour break in the middle. And especially last week, labs took longer than usual. I'm not gona say it was pointless but, ntahlah. Pastu that night a few people just pissed me off I just couldn't control myself. The last time that happened was in Form 5 in KYS. OMG, I just couldn't handle it. I was literally boiling up to my brains!

Every now and then after that I stayed up pastu my morning alarm didn't give any effect to me at all. AT ALL! Was it because I had a weird dream. Ok, I basuh kaki tau.

Pastu today, the rain/snow is so bad. WHY WOULD IT BE SNOWING AT THIS TIME OF THE YEAR?!!! That's global warming for you. The wind was the upmost horrible, over the top! I literally got to my flat faster than usual. Why? Because the wind blew me from behind. Takut ok kalau ada benda flying towards me and hit my head ke apa ke, it was soooooooooooooooo strong, the wind. So there was no point of me using my already-broken umbrella. And hence, I was soaked. And cold. And depressed!

And then kelas lab harini useless. Takda orang nak dengar cakap aku buat ni buat tu. Buat rileks je, tulis buruk-buruk pulak tu. Padan muka smorang kena marah. Takda soalan ditujukan kerana the context was kosong. Yeap, it was.

Now, I'm trying to calm myself down with chocolate chip cookies and milk. I can't eat ice cream or I'll freeze in my own pajamas. :((( I've been keeping everything in and was doing fine and then the rain came and its 3 degrees outside during spring and everything is just spilling!! *deep inhale* BENCI!! Nak balik Malaysia and mengadu kat Mister! I miss everybody but I'm a bad person because I'm too busy and couldn't keep in contact. BAD BAD GIRL! :(

I'm gona go shower now and have a good cry.

Ular

2010-03-23T12:17:00.000Z

Eeeeeee. But wowwwww. The name is Onichi I think? Because apparently it's Japanese, Hehe.

Tekad

2010-03-16T21:26:00.003Z

Saya, Izati MI, berjanji akan mula berusaha untuk peperiksaan akhir semester ini!!!

Timetable sudah keluar, boohooo. So early! That's a good thing I guess so that I can start planning on my studies!! Ok so exams will be on the 10th, 11th and 13th of May! JAHAT! GILA! And practical exam will be on 16th, I think? That is if I'm not exempted, which I probably won't. Sigh. Its a good thing because I'll finish early and I can enjoy my summer and think of moving etc. BUT! It's a lot of stress!! Which means I have to have to have to start now!

After Easter there'll be lots and lots of tests namely prescription test, RTS video test, all the class tests! And there's also the hospital placement to be worried about. Jahat la diorang niiiiiiiiii. :(

Oleh itu! Kalau ada big gaps between classes, jangan balik rumah dan lepak! Or jangan ponteng sebab malas sebab ada gaps! Sila ke library dan belajar ya. :) Yes I can! Pastu Wednesdays mentang-mentang free, kena start ke library semula!! Yes I can! Woop! InsyaAllah.

For now, let's finish my CV. Kena buat CV for work dahhhh. So early kan? Eee kakut kakut! Now, where did I put Ms Lai's version of my CV dulu. Hahah found it in my old USB! Gaaahahahah I'm so proud! Have to start altering then.

Shorty

2010-03-14T01:42:00.006Z

I miss my short hair suddenly. Although I do like the length now. It's just that, I RARELY get a good short haircut. Best betul la hairdresser tu. I promised myself to not forget his name, but well. All the drugs' name pushed him away from my memory, oopsie. ;) But I know where he's at! Somewhere in Hartamas. That's good enough right?

I cut my hair about the same time as Morven did and mine is waaaayyyy longer now. Hehe.

Neh, I don't think he liked my short haircut? Why? Because previously, every time its cut short I would complain it doesn't look nice. Which is true! But not that time. Legendary hairdresser betul. Good thing it grows fast.

And my dear shorty best friend, HAPPY 21st!!! You're finally legal, Nurjannah Iman Syaqirene Ahmat (did I spell that right? :p) ILY!

It's back

2010-03-10T17:47:00.002Z

The lawn mower is back and I'm emotionally distressed over it!

Sigh, hurt my hand hitting the laptop too hard. T.T

Ingat dia manusia ke apa.

Hideous

2010-03-09T16:00:00.002Z

We look ridiculous don't we? Hehe. Miss you!

Tutor bangin' heads

2010-03-09T00:06:00.002Z

Had tutorial this morning. Lucky me, dapat tutor explaining every single thing including history of gentamicin that doesn't really concern us (for now).

Took me 40 minutes to walk to class, double the time than usual. Literally dragged my feet, nasib tak pengsan tengah jalan. Just kidding. ;p

But anyway, his voice was doing my head in! It wasn't anything abnormal or disturbing but it's just that memang tengah nak pening plus sinusitis nya. I literally shut my ears, during tutorial. Sure dia pikir wth is wrong with this girl, kan?

Tomorrow another tutorial. Hope Ms AT won't be as annoying in class than in tutorial. I can just imagine. And it'll prolly be worse than today too considering it's at 9 in the morning. Good luck to me.

Good night.

Prodromal

2010-03-07T16:50:00.003Z

I'm having the prodromal symptoms. On a Sunday. Weh, tomorrow is Monday wehhhh, can't afford to have migraine nowwww with a career fair and all. I have a long research to do. Wtf. Can't even hear the bus passing by the main road or it'll be throbbingly 'sensational'. Nak balik rumaaaahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:'((

Seniority

2010-03-05T23:51:00.002Z

I never get this really. Actually I do and I acknowledge it because that's what we do in school. But ever since I got here, people really don't care. They just don't. I used to during first year and then I realised no one gives a shit. They would look at me funny every time I mention of it. And I understand why, because basically we don't know them, we don't care about them and the same to them as well. Same like I don't know who my 'seniors' or 'juniors' are and I couldn't care less.

But ever since I stepped into this year of my course, I've been bumping into 'seniors' whom I've never really met and even have the TIME to REMIND me that "Owh yea, I'm your senior ok." Like, so? Yes yes I understand you've gained another year of the same course but are you my boss now? Are you my CEO now? No right? I don't even know you and the probability of meeting you in the future is like so P value > 0.05 and so why the hell care?

Why the heck take the time and effort to actually tell and remind me? Would it really make a difference to your life?? Gosh. It's just ME. I'm just one person out of so many others so why would you have to tell me? Did I even ask you? Ugh.

I've met another person that's kind of in the same position as me but she didn't mention to me any 'seniority'. I'm glad she didn't cause I'm literally sick of it. Like really, get a hold of yourselves and just, stop. Stop making a laugh out of yourselves. Maybe it's just my hormones but I don't think so. Why would I have abnormal hormones throughout the term. I've never had them before, whereas there's loads of your kind before if you've forgotten since I was here WAYYY before you were. Yes I've met loads before and they were fine and NORMAL. I may sound a bit snobbish saying that but that's the truth. Because I'm sick of it!

Baik aku tido. Nak bubur McD.

Bulan 3

2010-03-04T23:31:00.003Z

Sudah March!!!!!

So many datelines. So many things to do this month. A good "work your butt off" month before the 'deserving' break for Easter? I don't know.

The only way to survive: Don't pause because when I do, I can't start balik. Jig it? So, hopefully I'll get the flow. Beri daku semangat! Fuh!!

Now tidur time. The flu is really bugging me... :'( I hate flu with watery eyes! Makes me cry just to get rid of it. Hehe. It's the weather I think. It's warm but it's not warm, it'll be more extreme later so I'll have to take care of myself.

Drink lots of fluid and exercise a lot, I always say to my virtual patients. Haha pseudo me.

Bbyong~!

p/s: Tomorrow first day of sterile lab. Will I get to wear the penguin suit? =)

Edit: Sneezed every 10 seconds for the last 10 minutes of lab. Contamination much?

Mandala pendant

2010-02-28T18:30:00.001Z

Tell me if u like it.

Nasi Goreng Burger

2010-02-28T01:13:00.002Z

During 'balik kampung' time back in the days, I don't think I remember going through the highway to go to Port Dickson. We had to take the 'kampung' road. And I can still remember passing by a certain river bridge that has this really really really strong stench that surpasses my brother's toxic fart and could pass through our old Volvo car. My parents would say "Bau babi, bau babi." I think they were right. Masa tu banyak case J.E.. Takda hygiene babi langsung.

In PD town, Dad would show us where his old house was. It was by the beach, facing the sea. "You could see the sunset every single day when the sky was clear," he said. But in this time after decades, the land has been submerged by the sea itself. The level has gone up by THAT much, because last time he could still walk THAT far. *imagine me pointing the far sea to you, hehehe* We would also go eat ABC gelas. Apparently the business is there every since Dad's time! And I would assume much earlier too because during Dad's time, the business was the father's and now it's the friend's. And like right now, it's the son's! Get it? But owh well, they still remember each other and we would always go find that ABC gelas. Last raya we were looking for it and realised that the whole block was demolished or something. Then we found a sign, ABC gelas somewhere. And it turns out to be them!! What coincidence eh? Meanwhile, Mum would show us the old cinema where she watched a movie with Dad. The building is still there with the old sign, never demolished. Not yet, anyway. On the same day, the May 13th incident happened. She said there were noises and sirens every where but they were asked to stay indoors, ke something like that, I don't really remember. I only remember the sirens part, hehe.

Back in the days in Taman TKK, we would be so excited to meet each other! All the cousins, the uncles and aunts, and of course our beloved Tuk and Nenek. There were loadssss of us kids, it was a noisy house. The house is not the typical kampung house. It's single storey bungalow with a large living room, three bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, and a small kitchen. Not to mention the big garden space at the front AND back. All with beautiful flowers kept by Nenek. All the boys would want to book the 'bilik hujung' while all the girls want the 'bilik tengah'. But when it comes to bedtime, everyone wants to bring out the mattresses and toto(s) and pillows and blankets to the large living room and sleep together. We would tell each other stories and eventually sleep.

When morning comes, Tuk would be the one cooking breakfast for us. Then we would all walk to the beach to mandi laut. Bila puas, pergi beli ice cream kat tepi Petronas pump station, or beli nasi lemak. And then continue mandi laut again until surut around 5-ish. I really don't like it bila dah surut, the laut feels weird and makes me itchy. I remember everyone saying, memanglah hitam, mandi laut pagi ke petang. Well, memang pun. :)

Tuk would make a special nasi goreng called NASI GORENG BURGER!! Basically it's the usual fried rice but with small cubes of burger meat. It was so so heavenly. We asked Mum to make them every time we miss eating nasi goreng burger since Tuk had a stroke and couldn't really move about. It's actually the same, she cooked it the same way and everything. But it still feels and tastes different. We still wanted him to cook for us. Tuk masak sedapppp. Telur goreng pun boleh jadi sedap. Every time any of us ask him to cook something, he would put a thumbs up and say "SET!" with a big cheeky smile. Kind of like my dad. Hehe. And air milo would always be the nicest when made by him. Ingat lagi we all budak-budak ponteng puasa, he made air milo so that we can eat them with bread. Heaven, I tell you.

But we were all afraid of Nenek. Nenek memang garang. We would be running every where in the house, spraying water at each other, and with just one word from her, everyone would suddenly be sitting down, reading books or watching tele. Hehe. I remember being so scared of Nenek. She was beautiful, but she always looked so thin and frail although she was actually strong.

Nenek passed away of Alzheimer's. She really couldn't remember any of us. Except for my mum. She only trusted Mummy, as far as I can remember. She passed away when I was 13. I remember being so devastated because she was my first family member to go, so it was kind of like a first time for me to feel that way. To make it worse, it was during KYS's Family Day. It was past midnight when I got to Taman TKK. Everyone was asleep except a few uncles. That was the first time I saw them so weak, so heartbroken, so sad, that it made me shocked. And I saw her placed on the floor as they read Yassin in the dark, but I could still see their red, watery eyes. I couldn't bring myself to see her figure. There were no other places for me to sleep since I was late. So I had to sleep on her bed. It felt strange. I remember thinking, "No one else has been on this bed for years, except for Nenek. She would lie down here and ask for water and every time I want to salam her she would be lying here. And now it's empty, and I'm sleeping here!" I also remember telling myself to not be scared. They say after 3 days a person passes away, the soul would still be in the house to watch over relatives? I don't know how true that is.

I think Tuk passed away 2 years later. About the same month I think, or maybe near. I remember lots of tears, especially those who really took care of him over the years. It was an overnight weekend for me. We just got home from fetching me from KYS and were preparing to have a dinner out when Dad got a call. I have never seen him so urgent before. We skipped dinner and went straight to PD hospital, but we were too late. I think only one of the aunts saw him left. Everyone was crying next to his bed, but I remember just sitting at the corner and looking at them. You know the scenarios in the dramas or movies where they stood around the bed crying and the camera just has the nicest angle to see them. At that particular time, I was the camera. I saw it all. I remember lots of tears during the funeral. Some were unmanageable. I was scared looking at his pale face and I choked up, but I wanted to give him my last goodbye kiss. I didn't cry. One thing I can't do, cry in front of my family. There are only a few times I did and I can but at that time, I didn't. I felt I needed to be strong for them. But as always, in KYS, before I sleep I would remember both Tuk and Nenek and I would cry.

The year after, Raya was just not the same, it felt so strange. No one knows where to go and what to do and at the end of the season, you won't be able to meet everyone pun. A few years later, we managed. Like now, we would go back to Linggi and visit the kambing(s) and see the puppies and the turkeys. I say not only the kids that are excited, even we were! And of course we get to meet our big big other side of the family too. It has been a few years already since I set my eyes on that wonderful house in Taman TKK. The last time I did, the jungle opposite it was still scary, Nenek's flowers were all dry and gone, the house looked sad. Just sad. I even felt afraid to go in. How could I when even the gate would feel just so familiar. Burglars kept breaking in, taking the good TV, the still good old vacuum cleaner (it's a good brand, maybe that's why it was taken), the washing machine, the lights and fans! Seriously people, get a life.

All that will be changed. Dad told me they would be selling the house soon. They're trying to find a good and trustworthy buyer as the house means a lot to all of us. Dad said as they were cleaning the house, he found so many things still kept by Tuk. He found letters that were sent by him to Tuk when he was staying in the States. Tuk kept every single letter, apparently, and filed them together. There were also Tuk's clothes and kain pelekat. Photos and even birth certs! One thing went through my head when Dad told me all this: I wonder how Dad felt when he found the things left by Tuk. I never want to imagine.

Now, Adam and Ariz are going through what I went through when I was a much younger grandchild. Except they didn't go and mandi laut every weekend, hehe. Sebab tu diorang putih! haha! Mum always cooks the rice with a little bit of brown rice, for health reasons. The kids just love it so that asked their Mum to cook the rice the same way. But nope, it wasn't a success for them. They say it doesn't feel right and it just doesn't taste the same! Doesn't that seem familiar? Hehe. They want Nanna to do it, jugak.

Just like how we loved our nasi goreng burger.

Rain is Hujan is Bi

2010-02-25T19:45:00.002Z

It was snowing all day yesterday. Thank God I stayed indoors. To add to it, the wind was horrible. They said everything was horrible.

But today was even horrible! To me, at least. It hasn't rained this much, although this IS the typical winter in Glasgow, rain rain rain rain. This winter tak hujan as much as the previous two years, as far as I can remember. Other Malaysian classmates were complaining on how dry and cold it is, but everyone else has been grateful since there hasn't been much rain!! Owh, but not today.

Had to dig my bag for my umbrella, dah lama tak guna. Little did I remember that the umbrella sudah cacat. But have to make do, it's still usable. Prepped myself, pakai long sleeve hoodie, pakai topi, put my hood on, wrapped myself with my scarf, pakai jacket and let's go!

So I was walking with my umbrella up to my department, with a few casualties here and there with it. Especially with the not-know-where-it's-coming-from wind. I had walk carefully, not too near the road as fast cars could not care less for pedestrians, just bashed through the puddle. Tak sayang kereta ke?! Hish.

I almost arrived, just two more minutes. I was already at the construction site of our new department building. There was a shaded pathway next to it for pedestrians' use. As I entered I closed my umbrella, what's the point of having it up anyways. A few seconds after that, SPLASSSSSHHHHH!!!!!!!! Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Drenched! Drenched with puddle of dirty smelly brown water! All over my hat, my face, my coat, my pants. AAAGGGGHHHHH!

What could be worse I didn't realize there was a lecture this morning for our hospital placements this April. Went to class as usual. Today classes jauh-jauh pulak tu. Great, on a rainy day. Had a lab session in the evening. Went in for 10 minutes, did the stuff, had to go out and wait for an hour and a half, went back in for 10 minutes, and that was us done. HOW FUN! Decided to go to the library after for some reading. When I saw out the window it wasn't raining as heavily, I decided to leave and go back home before the rain starts to fall again. No actually I lied. Terasa nak shopping because its Thursday night, kedai tutup lambat.

Tapi suddenly takda mood, so balik rumah je lah after beli a new beanie. :)))) It was on sale, £3 je. Jalan jalan jalan jalan jalan. SPLASH!! STUPID BASTARD! SAJA JE KAN?! JALAN BUKAN MAIN LUAS LAGI, NAK JUGAK ROSAKKAN KERETA DRIVE LAJU-LAJU KAT PUDDLE. KALAU SKIDDED MACAM MANA?! BUDUS.

Changed to dry clothes as soon as I arrived home, and decided to cook chicken soup. Sigh, on a cold rainy day, feels nice to eat chicken soup. And on a stressful day, feels even nicer to eat ice cream! Somehow feel so tired, feels like it's Friday today. It's not, so wake up! Tomorrow lagi fun okay, pagi sampai ke petang, siap ada lab lagi. Yes, lagiiii.

munch munch munch munch. At this rate, I don't know how much longer I have to wait for a warmer Glasgow. BIG SIGH.

Bila tension tengok orang lain

2010-02-24T00:09:00.004Z

Today suddenly had the urge to cook a proper dinner. Craved for ayam goreng halia ala-ala Kak Amy's cafe masa in KYS dulu. Ada la rasa sikit but not as good. Takda the fav 'sampah-sampah'. hehehe

I just washed my hair today. Tutup rambut pun still bau dapur jugak. Complain ni nampak sangat tak selalu duduk dapur, hahahah!

Hmm, bila dah tau tak selalu masak tu, terkejut pulak tgk kuali yang takdala lawa sangat, dah terkopek sini sana. It's the non-stick one I got from Ikea for £2 only, big enough to cook a lot of servings I must say. It was already spoiled before by my old flatmate, 'twas just a few scratches. But now it's a wreck! I almost cried.

My mug from NEXT pun ada pecah sikit. I only realized after a few days I bought it, guna pun baru sekali. Tak taula when exactly pecah. Haishhh.

Sigh. Clearly emotions tak stable lagi. Up and down macam yoyo.

Tadi masa lab pun merepek. Selalu it's me and kawan perempuan ni akan duduk tepi dan saksikan argument yang bukan sebenarnya argument antara dua jejaka yang bengong bin bangang. Sebelum start lab dah agak dah, kami berdua akan sama-sama cakap "I sense an argument coming". Memang pun! Mr A tetiba bengang pastu complain kepada kami pastu Mr B kata macam mana every thing's decided when dia takda cakap apa-apa pun? Dah kau duduk kat tepi tingkap cakap "I don't care I don't care" memang la jadi macam tu, pandai! HISH! Pastu tanya nak kena buat apa padahal masa orang tua tu explain kau duduk jauh-jauh. Nasib aku ni baik, explain jugak dekat kau hanya kerana aku unlucky dapat drug sebelah drug kau. HISH! Kawan perempuan aku pun gelakkan aku kerana stuck dengan jejaka bengong bin bangang itu dan lantas pandang slack kat laki tu. HUAHUAHUA. Nak gaduh tapi taknak bercakap dengan each other. So kami gadis2 terpaksa duduk di tengah2. Drama ok, drama. Nyampah aku budak2 ni!!

Minggu lepas lagi drama antara mister-mister ni! Haha tiba2 gossip kat sini plak kan. Wth. Nak kena mini-vacuum some cells ke apa ntah, pastu knowing Mr B ni bengong bin bangang bin biul. Dia dah tau dia tak tau apa-apa (that sounds confusing but that is it), pastu suka hati dia buat ni buat tu. Pastu pakcik demonstrator ni datang berlari2 dan menjerit "No no no no no nooo" betul2 sebelah telinga dia tapi dia masiiiiiiiiih sambung mem-vacuum macam takda effect langsung!!!!!!! Kami bertiga tak terkata. HABIS SPOIL! Pastu mula lah Mr A ni bengang. Dia vacuum cell semua orang cepat2, taruk whatever that's needed cepat2 pastu bla. DRAMAAA! Bukannya bitch drama, anjing drama. Asalkan results aku elok sudah.

Sigh, I should get my ice cream.

Elevation

2010-02-22T16:41:00.004Z

Hari ini mood sungguh baik! Saya suka!

Maybe because today's symptoms lab went quite well and my confidence got a little bit higher. Not sure about next week though. Tutorial went well too. Tomorrow another full day, and I'll get my usual Wednesday off. WOOHOOO. Terasa nak shopping because dah lama gila tak shopping but haritu just bought a set of linens. So, em, but that's different! I want nice bajus.. :( That's the only thing that's keeping me down today. And also I miss home jugak. :(

I should go and get something to eat.

Btw, Teddy's in UK.

He didn't believe me when I said Glasgow was sunny and panas sampai berpeluh. Well I didn't mention you would still have to wear a winter coat, but it IS true! Jangan jealous ok orang dekat London. I heard it's snowing somewhere mid-Eng. Pity, it's already February! Hehehe I shouldn't say much, nanti snow datang sini. DREADFUL!

p/s: Did I mention I crave for toasts nowadays? Just toast with butter and kaya. TAPI KAYA TAKDE! ADA SUGAR JE!! HMPH!

Awaken

2010-02-20T06:26:00.002Z

Woke up at 5. I always do these days, no idea why. It's suddenly too warm in this cold weather. Must be my mattress heater. Switched it off, and got up from bed to switch the lights on. I could feel the cold again.

I looked at myself in the mirror. Eyes swollen, face reddened, sweat drops from my forehead, not to mention my hair going all over the place. My t-shirt dampened from the sweat. I crawled back into bed and switched on my laptop.

The images ran through my mind again. Why did I have that dream? I crumbled and cried just thinking about it. Did it mean anything?

I decided to call home to straighten my mind. It feels calmer now.

Need my sleep back.